i don’t know

I haven’t typed in here in a while, I suppose. Well, given my track record with OD, I’ve been keeping up this thing fantastically 😉 I’ve been somewhat busy with being an actual social person. I went on a date with a man who had the charisma and wit of a serial killer, but I doubt he is. Went on another date with a really sweet guy that I think is still in love with his ex, and topped off the weekend picking up a friend and hanging out with him. He passed out on Nyquil, and I ended up entertaining myself with the motel jacuzzi, bubble bath, and raspberry coacoa.

I find myself thinking about my romantic future as of late. I’m too interested in my friend who won’t take me seriously since I’m not divorced, and I live with my still-technical husband. Unfortunately, money doesn’t grow on trees, and given the choice of going back to college or moving out, I’ll have to choose school =[ In the end, my feelings are hurt every time my friend is with a new woman, but I can’t do anything but play the friend role and act like I don’t consider anything serious. In truth, I can’t. He’s too strange and flippant. It would be disastrous for a long haul, but I can’t help but be attracted to him like a bug to light.

Always, work is mundane yet sometimes intense. I sometimes wish I could take back the last seven years and put them to better use. I wouldn’t be at this job, which I should be rather thankful for having. I make twice as much as I did here when I started two years ago, and this town is full of empty minimum wage jobs.

I’m going to go listen to music and feel alone in my feelings, when in reality, I’m sure there are hundreds thinking these same thoughts.