growing pains

Oh you’re making me grow again, I can feel the changes in my shape
And it’s making me ache again, I say there’s not much more I can take
But that’s just all the talkin’, the talkin’ never stops inside my brain
As much as I deny it, the truth is there is one here to blame
There’s all these pains I have from growing, but I feel I am no different, just the same

I’m biting my nails again, the familiar ache has returned to my skin
I’m lying to myself again, I’ll say anything it seems to get through to him
I rationalize my flaws, downplay the masochism and the sin
Missing the mark is an art I’ve mastered, as patience for myself is wearing thin, thin, thin, thin
I feel these pains I have from growing, yet it seems I am no different, once again

And so the truth just keeps on waiting, oh it sits there ever watchful through my life
It has no quality nor agenda just an opened palm that’s ready for my sight
But with these pains I from growing, I keep searching for the time when I’ll be light

Oh my confusion’s raw again, I can feel it seeping from my pores
but this time there’s no compromise, it craves my attention, won’t be ignored
It’s coming out in rhythms, they spiral down the column of my spine
They’re pulling at my fingers, they’re pushing all my ideals out of line
All these pains I have are groaning, but I don’t know if I’ll quiet them this time
I feel I need the discord, for it’s darkness makes the stars to shine most bright

Whoo!  I think I remembered it correctly!

Apparently I never wrote this down except in an  old journal that I left at home in the states.  This is one of my favorite songs I’ve written, and the most recent, though it was almost 7 years ago!  So long!  Time to get back on it.