Im back!!! But…I am so not better than ever. ARG
Okay…omg..I got to see CJ. Let me tell you, the first time I saw him, every fear, sadness or ache that resided in my heart was instantly melted away. He smiled at me from about 10 feet away (even though they weren’t supposed to smile) and he took away any negativity I had within me. I was so unbelievably happy. I was…beyond ecstatic. After the pinning ceremony, I was just…soooo amazingly happy, they said "the" word. "DISMISSED" and I went flying from the stands out into the crowd of Marines and searched endlessly for my husband, then I felt these arms encircle my waist…there he was. I turned and held him tighter than I have ever in my entire life. It was AMAZING. The next few days were a blur. The next day was his graduation, and then we actually got to take him away for ten days. I swear we spent every moment enveloped in each others arms. He couldn’t stop kissing me, it was beautiful. He kept kissing me, and holding me, and squeezing me. He took every instant to take my hand, my waist, anything, just to be able to touch me. I wouldn’t have changed it for the world. It was amazing, and beautiful. He made me feel like a queen. He is the only man that has ever made me feel so radiant. We went to Disneyland, and so forth, and the beach and oh, gosh, lots of places. We just had fun, period. I’ll post pictures and stuff soon. It may be a couple of days though…
Here is the not so good part!!!!!!!!!
Sunday, CJ and I went fishing together. We had an ABSOLUTE BLAST. Well…I was feeling pretty out of it, and we were going to spend the whole day monday, out with our son Aidan, and just having an all out family day, since CJ was leaving on Tuesday, the 31st. Well…we got home on sunday, and CJ started to pack, I was feeling extremely tired for some unknown reason, and I decided to crash before he did. I slept for about 2 hours and then I woke up…and I couldn’t open my eyes. I reached up and touched them and they were the size of golfballs, and were getting bigger. OMG…I panicked. We almost went to the emergency room. I had no idea what was going on, I was nautious, and dizzy, and I was unable to see, even when I pried my eyes open, I still couldn’t see. It was excruciating pain. CJ was really upset and worried about me. We went to the doctor the next morning and they said that i have one of the most severe cases of Keratitis and Conjunctivitis that they’d seen. And my corneas were in big trouble. So needless to say, our special monday, was spent with aidan and CJ out doing things to get ready for CJ to leave. I think the worst part of it all,was not being able to see CJ or make love before he left. I was in so so so much pain, I couldn’t even make love to my husband before he left again for another two months. GOD… I feel like this past week was all a bad dream… Like… like he’s not really gone, Im just asleep and and having a nightmare. I can’t believe I didn’t get to see his face before he left…I didn’t get to see him. My heart is just…in pieces right now. I miss him so fucking bad. I don’t know how to do this again. I can’t handle another two months apart from him. This is the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. I can’t handle being apart from my one true love… How do I make my heart stop crying?
As for my eyesight..its Thursday now, and Im just starting to get it back. The swelling has gone down, but Im severely bruised. I look like I got the shit beat outta me. I also have very hazy vision. I can KINDA see, I mean, shapes, objects, light, dark, and its all like hazy…but other than that, Im not quite there yet. I have my face almost plastered to the computer screen right now… Heh. Well…theres my update. Hopefully I’ll get my sight back soon so I can add pictures and whatnot. Byee..