golden years

i got a call from my sister today…

my father has pneumonia…

he is also in final stage Parkinson’s with Louis Body dementia…

he may not survive this…

he and i did not have a good relationship in the past…

it only got better in the last few years…

he was prominent in my earlier writings as both hero and tormentor…

i want to be, say something that can describe how i feel…

i am at a loss…