I Could Say it Stronger, But it’s Too Much Trouble

So, about this whole "not saying anything, particularly in light of a somewhat disquieting entry" thing, sorry. Believe me, I’d like to talk about life and so forth. It’s fine, just in case you’re worried. You know what a drama queen I can be.

But, of course when I consider talking about all of these things, it quickly amounts to such a pretty lengthy entr(y/ies) and lately I haven’t had quite the ability to go into all of it.

So in place of a bunch of long entries, how about bullets, those are cool right?

– I don’t know if I’ve mentioned, but I have a new job doing data entry about fish. It’s much less stressful and horrible than the movie theater, though this in itself is somewhat problematic. At first I was glad to be away from the dickheads and morons of the world, but now I find I miss them. After all, if I want to write things, it doesn’t do much good to be cut off from my primary source of inspiration. Add to that that I spend 40 or fewer hours in front of a computer all day typing, I confess I get kind of burned out on it.

– Things are fine otherwise. I’m preparing to send off Partyville USA to basically anywhere that short stories aren’t cut off at 7,000 words (needless to say, there are few, especially in a genre market). I will let you know there are various contingency plans should this fail (and why wouldn’t it).

– I’ve been reading things, and I think it’s possible that I have bipolar disorder. Firstly, this isn’t as bad as it sounds. Really it just offers an explanation to my batty personality. This whole journal makes more sense, really. The way I cut from bizarro comic bits to oppressive nihilism (see: last entry). It also helps explain why I have this obsession with writing/creating, etc, given that basically anybody who has ever been creative tends to have it.

– While we’re on the partially on the subject of pain, I’m said last entry didn’t scare anyone too much. Over the years I’ve learned various methods for coping with pain, to the degree I’ve come to appreciate it to some degrees. I think it’s wrong for us to think of pain as something to be avoided at all costs. There is much we can learn from pain if we reconcile ourselves to it as an integral part of our existence. We can learn that all emotional states are transient, that the more we allow ourselves to suffer the more we can suffer, and that without knowing pain we can’t really understand or appreciate joy.

– That said, thanks to everyone who responded, you nice people you.

– Also, as a disclaimer, I’m talking about the horrible suffering of the everyday life, not tragedy. At least I can’t say with certainty. Anyway enough.

– Worst Music is half written, but you know, the thing.

– There are so many more of those fucking things too, jesus.

– This is getting pretty long, actually.

– Right about there should do it.