Gap year…

I didn’t get in.

So…this is officially my gap year but i have no money to do anything yet and no one to do it with! Carl is still in college so he’ll be finished his course in june then we’ll probably just go on holiday somewhere and come back to the same crap!

I want to do something spontanious but planning to do something takes the spontinaity out of it! I’m so tired of doing the right thing all the time…all my life i’ve been the good girl, i never got in (much) trouble at school, i never smoked or did drugs and I don’t drink. I just feel like i’m wasting my time here. I need to DO something. I’m going to a hens party next week and I think i’ll just get ridiculously drunk and let someone else look after me for a change!

I have to wait until the end of the year before I can apply for my course again so I don’t want to waste this year. Its already the end of Feb and even though I’ve been on two holidays already this year it still doesn’t feel like I’ve done anything. I get paid next week so everything starts from there!

Bye For now

-Aoife

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i do talk to my mom. im never suprised. i dont want to be weak so crying isnt an option for me.