Miscarriage and Stomache Flu

So can you believe that whole miscarriage thing took 6 weeks……6 fricken weeks of bleeding.
2 times during it, I bleed so bad I was scared.  Nothing was as bad as the morning I woke up in basically a pool of it.  That was week 5 PEOPLE.    Its weird that was my 2nd miscarriage…..The first one was so fast that emotionally it was extremely hard…This one emotionally fine, physically HELL!! After 6 weeks of bleeding can it be like MAY  when I get my period again???   Well it would have been till then if I didn’t miscarry right??

So anyway speaking of that.  I’m out with the boy trick or treating and my parents next door neighbor (whom has 2 boys as well) states  I’m pregnant and due in MAY" 
"congrats I say" trying hard to stop myself from saying yeah I was pregnant and was going to be due in May too. But seeing as I didn’t tell my parents…no not going there. 
Ahh the tangled web I weave.  I’m a bad daughter.  I just know if I tell them its going to be talked about to all my realatives and I don’t want that…

I HATE attention on me….
I hated when my husband died and got the pitty party crap. I don’t like it… I’m not that kind of person.

Speaking of…..it hard for me to admit I"m sick.   I hate giving in.  I don’t admit that well either.  If I’m telling you I’m not feeling well that means I"m fricking sick as hell.  If I tell you I’m sick.  Than I’m seriously sick as I don’t admit to it easily.

Had the stomache flu….pissed as I told him I was sick….I stayed home from work. I got no sleep the night before.  I couldn’t sleep as I was achey feverish and had the other fun things that accompany the stomache flu….Jonathan threw up around 1 am . I was still up. Changed his bed and he made me sleep with the light on till 3 am when he was fast asleep. I put him to bed and may have sleep from 3-4 am till I started in.  I was exhausted.   He decided to go play in Buffalo the next day  and wondered why I was pissed  when he didn’t return till 9 pm.   With 2 kids to watch all day, no sleep and sick….. What the F was my problem. You mean I didn’t take off for his comfort  and told me he was stressed and was still stressed.  I was still sick when I went to work Friday.  I had a fever and woke up during the middle of the night dreaming on was in a tent on one of those occupy on wall street  groups. Freezing my @$$ off.  Trying to rationalize why I was out there in my fever  and chill induced dream….. Of course waking up still freezing cold even with 3 comforters on me.   I sit at a computer and talk on  the phone all day….. I have to be really sick not to be able to handle that.  Only to come home to find Jonathan threw up again..he tried to make it to throw up in his little potty . Not all got in there but great for trying.  Still on the floor. He threw a towel on it.  Fine if it was anything but CARPET…. YEah great…. Now I need to steam clean carpets and although phyically my job isn’t tough…its still a job and does wear on you.   By this point  its 6 pm Friday. I haven’t eaten anything since Wednesday around 6 and that was on’y a tiny bit.  It was one of those you think its hunger till you start eating and go nope…. Its nausea and if I take one more bit its all coming up.
 Had NO energy to clean….
And he wonders why I’ve been in a crappy mood.

So today…..he’s got the stomache flu……
Moaning and groaning.  I thought about going out and leaving the kids with him.
Didn’t think it was fair to the kids
Yeah you thought I wanted sympathy??? NO…. One word SLEEP !

Yeah its alot of fun this stomach flu thing……
Look whom laughing now??

Men are fricken babies

He slept all day.. Even whe nI was out he called me. Didn’t have the cell with me but he called the house phone looking for me…. Are you kiding me??