08/01/2010

So my mother makes a comment about Andrew not reading well and that I should work with him constantly on this and she talked to her friend and through the high school there are people that are reading coaches.   This aggravates me!! I look for things for him to progress with his reading. I know its very difficult for him to learn and its coming.  I know that he is SO far behind that they didn’t recommend extra help as he would be  in the kindergardener extra help and he’s going into 3rd grade!!!    I guess you wouldn’t be able to afford it anyway.  Thank mom I feel great .  Rub in I’m poor with a disabled son.  I know she meant well but geez be helpful about it.  I do what I can and he will let me do.   Obviously with him things take time. He’s getting it but very slowly. He has dyslexia and such and it interfers  with it.  Really I like banging my head against the wall ……

I’ve never thought of myself as a racist….I don’t like that. My grandmother was a HUGE big time racist and I hate her.  But its gotten to the point with the last 2 summers I HATE dare I say it …..BLACK people! I do…..  I don’t care that I said it. If you have had to put up with the crap I have had to within the last 2 years I have a reason.   I don’t like to be despised and look down upon because I’m white.  I don’t like having attitudes being thrown at me b/c their black ass can’t stand white people and niether can their off spring.  I  don’t like being stared at everyday , morning till night if I go out my front door like I’m some damn TV show for their enjoyment.  As they have NOTHING better to do than sit there all day long. I did nothing to this race!! I shouldn’t be hated on because I’m white.  My ancestors did nothing to this race either b/c they were all poor immigrants back in the early 1900’s. They weren’t slave owners. I’m tired of their attitude towards me and we can’t say a thing or they call the cops on us and be called racists.   NOTHING.  They know they system ….  Okay if it was that them I would say…..its that group and they are a bunch of ignorant assholes, but no.  Then we have the park near our house.  During the morning is fine but by evening almost every evening there’s a group of that ethnic race there and again. They don’t watch there kids and are loud and obnoxious and are nasty as hell if you walk by and your white.   If they can can HATE me so much and I didn’t do a thing to them just b/c I’m white. It should go without saying I can hate them..  I don’t want to be prejudice. But when a lot of  ignorant idiots from that group  are making my life miserable …but no its a sin to hate blacks but TOTALLY okay for them to hate me.  I’m all for equally but I should get the same respect  too. If your not giving it ,than fine I’m not either.  I probably will get  all kinds of nasty messages about "how could I say that" " you are racist" but  why is okay for them to call us whitey and cracker and  we can’t call them names. Do you think I find it amusing to be called this all the time???  Yeah doesn’t make me happy.  I’m not saying all of them are like that.   Its the ignorant ones that think the world owes them a free ride.  I lived in the south and I have to say…..I NEVER met ANY that acted this way .

 I just ignore them the best I can.  Maybe if I gave them a book or the paper they would have to stare so much and would have something to do…. but then I don’t know if they can read…..that be a whitey thing you know. We wouldn’t want to better ourselves as they may take away our free ride and have to do something other than sit on the porch.   ****SORRY I know Not funny sarcasism****

 I guess I should be thankful that 1) Drug dealer one is in jail.    2) they aren’t having anymore parties on the front lawn and blasting their "F@#!ing" music  (which BTW has alot of that word and other bad words in it great for children to hear) 3) I’ve been in the back yard mostly as Jonathan will not stay on the porch.  
So sorry I probably offended a bunch of people and you won’t read me anymore but I don’t like being discriminated either and I really don’t like the fact its taboo to say it.