#116

I’m feeling better already. I decided to take a shower this fine night (morning :P) and I ran a shower and I just laid there and soaked as the tub filled up with water (I plugged it like i was taking a bath). To begin with I was aiming to try and feel the things around me all the more; when I’m really close to a particular element, in this case water, I find it easier to lose myself in that element…but I let it go pretty quickly and I just laid there. Then I looked at my legs and they looked so strange, almost like they weren’t my legs at all. I recognized them but they looked and felt so foreign. I tested them, moving my toes, moving positions a little, and then I stretched my focus to various parts. I felt the water droplets as they struck my leg in a very specific spot almost perfectly. I broadened my focus and I just reveled in how beautiful the water felt, how amazing it all felt. It almost felt like I was experiencing all these things for the first time. It was absolutely amazing. I’m not worried at all; I’m just so tired that I must be in a daze….I’d have to be in a daze to be able to feel a shower the way I did, today. I’m glad I was, though. that shower was absolutely amazing, absolutely incredible. I don’t know if I’ve done something that blatantly pleasurable for a long, long time. I loved it.