Myths of Reality

Familiarity, the First Myth of Reality. What you know the best you observe the least.

Devotion, the Second Myth of Reality. The faithful are most hurt by the objects of their faith.

Conviction, the Third Myth of Reality. Only those who seek the truth can be deceived.

Fellowship, the Fourth Myth of Reality. As the tides of war shift, so do loyalties.

Trust, the Fifth Myth of Reality. Every truth holds the seeds of betrayal.

You left quite a little column for me to sift through.

And don’t take the one month thing too seriously…you have to remember that I’d never been through a breakup before. I had no idea what I was supposed to be doing, heh. And it was awkward and didn’t feel right, so I stopped. I don’t find much fault in that.

And no, the comments were not meant for you. I was merely using the diary to vent. I realize that some of my entries might be hurtful, and I’m sorry in advance. But at the same time, I don’t see much point in keeping a diary if I’m censoring it heavily so that other people won’t get hurt by my thoughts. Because whether or not they want to hear it, the thoughts are still there to be expressed.

I dont see this as a breach of trust, laps in judgment or failure of inner strength. In the end, no, I dont think we viewed our relationship the same. Of course, thats to be expected, we are different people. I still care for you a great deal, but I just cant put my life on pause indefinitely. Perhaps that makes me a weaker person than you. At the same time, Im what17?

Im going to liveat least another 80 years or so and I dont plan on being a hermit throughout.

Concerning reincarnationI too have that little nagging feeling that weve known each other before. But ever considered that, well, it didnt work out then either? Perhaps this isnt our end all and be all, perhaps we have not yet attained our perfection and will come back for another round next time. Or maybe were destined for tragic endings. Just a thought.

Alsowould you make up your mind, heh. You send me rather mixed messages a good portion of the time. If you really want me to fly and be happy, why does it upset you so much when I try?

I didnt mean to upset you. Maybe next time Ill keep romantic happenings in my private diary, because, well, you freak out. At the same timewe always prided ourselves on being open with one another. Is this the limit of our honesty?

43 notes, impresionante. You’ve kinda innundated me. Though you might not be ‘upset’, that was a rather strong reponse…I don’t really have that much to say. Or rather, I don’t have time to say much. This was meant as a minor entry, the forcefulness of your response didn’t surprise me too much, but it did worry me to some extent.

With time, our little tiffs and misunderstandings wear at me more…Though I didn’t want to let you go, I’ve learned to function on my own in the last year. I don’t want to demean what we have/had. At the same time, I’m not where you are at this point…and that’s not a ‘bad’ thing for me. Whether you mean it or not,

you make me feel guilty for not hanging onto ‘us’ more forcefully. But here’s the thing: I’m happy. Finally, I’m happy. But then you go on rants like this…Angel, I refuse to feel guilty or to regret. But now…we’re not good for one another. There are good moments, but emotions run so high that someone gets hurt or forced out of control.

I don’t mean to offend…though I’m sure some of these notes sound hurtful. But maybe at this point, it’s time to let go a little.

You can delete your diary if you want. In any case, I’ll stop noting…perhaps that’s for the best. But I’m keeping mine, I like writing and don’t particularly want to stop posting.

l’hitraot

I really don’t care if you delete the diary or not. Does it even matter? I won’t be commenting, likely not even reading. I don’t view this diary as a ‘last link’ between us. Do what you like.