break down

 I had a break down yesterday,I even broke a cup,I cryed and I may said some stupid things that I had to ask GOD for forgiviness about it.

I watched wimbledon movie twice and it made my day.

I can’t have the power to fight;I got used to giving up that fighting seems so hard;I get angry fast because of stupid things like my brother taking my teeth  brush.

I really want to change;I want to be closer to GOD,I want to read books;I want to write;I want to be inspired,I want to get rid of my fear,I want to be strong,I want to be confident,I want to define my life and be happy with who I am,I want to stop comparing my self with others,I want to make my parents happy because to be honest with you my family is miserable now,no one is happy,every one is angry and sad.

this is not the plan,the plan is take advantage of this summer to have fun and relax but someone always remind me of the bad decisions I made,I have a lot of regerets about not applying to some schools,my choices in life,things that is too late to change any way.

every day is a battle and I remembered that I decided to challenge life but than I got my break down so I kind of chikend out.

please GOD!give me the strenght  and the courage to change my life.please GOD!take away from me my laziness and fear.Amen!

 

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I’m sure You’ll be able to change, but change doens’t just happen like that, it happens over time. Just be patient. Quote: “The two hardest tests on the spiritual road are the patience to wait for the right moment and the courage not to be disappointed with what we encounter.”

RYN: Indeed it is those small things which can make a difference! 🙂

August 9, 2012

Well my parents got divorced when i was young and my mum got with a nobhead so itll be rate

August 13, 2012

I’m so sorry I wasn’t here for this :'( You know what you want. Now all you have to do is go for it. Change the “I want” to “I will.” You have to remember that people will always try to break you down and remind you how imperfect you are, but in God’s eyes, you are lovely! You can’t write the next chapter in your life if you keep reading the last one. Keep going. I’m praying for you! <3

August 17, 2012

heyy !!! i really miss u so much !! sry 4 readin this too late , anyway, regrets about what u have done in the past about wrong decisions won’t give u the strength to carry on , okay i know u blame urself , but u must forget about what has already happened & start what u really want to do right now , god will give u the strength if u really wanna change ur life don’t worry !!!!