*head spins*

Hey guys (girls/ladies, really, I have very few male readers)!!

Man.  My life has apparently decided, "You know what, C?  NO, you CAN’T have downtime…I need you to be here, but it would also be great if you could be there, there, here, and everywhere, all the while thinking about various other heres, theres and someones…got it?"  And I’m just like "Alright, check!"

Case in point…my chicken curry is ready.  Damn.  I will come back to this in a few minutes!

—————————————————————————————————————————————————–

Okay!  I’m back!  And listening to the Chordettes…oh 50s era, how simple you were.  Or rather, how simple you were marketed to appear.

Soooo alright, it’s been maybe 40 minutes since I started writing this entry, and several things have happened.

1) I wolfed down my curry and paid the price in a sweaty face
2) My mum mentioned my great-uncle Dennis, who died in 2001 or 2002
3) Subsequently…I broke down and cried…not helped by my already-streaming curry nose

All she did was mention his name, and it took me back to when I was 3 or 4 years old, and we were in Wales visiting my mum’s family.  My Uncle Dennis and Auntie Elsie (my mum’s mum’s sister) were holding each of my hands and helping me avoid "cow plops" in a field.  It was overcast, but just a very happy day and I laughed a lot.  My mum had continued talking in the meantime, but I didn’t hear a word.  She didn’t notice I was crying until I sniffled audibly, because she was prattling on and eating her own curry.  She asked what was wrong and I explained, and then I told her "Please don’t quiz me on anything you said after Uncle Dennis" and she smiled and said she wouldn’t.  And proceeded to repeat everything she’d just said haha.

So…I’m alright.  It was a happy release of emotions kind of crying.  Not sobbing-omg-my-life-is-awful-it-couldn’t-get-much-worse-than-this crying, but one that got any pent-up stress out, in the form of a happy childhood memory.  It was also the first time I cried for his death.  I only saw him 2 or 3 times in my life, I think, and that cow plops memory was the last time, I think.  I must’ve been 15 or 16 when he died.  It was sad, yes, but I didn’t cry.

It was similar when my granddad died….my dad’s dad.  I’m learning more as I get older what my father and his father’s relationship was like, and what role my grandmother played.  Which I take to be a "standing by and letting it happen" kind of role…which in turn may have been influenced by the way SHE was brought up.  I didn’t see my granddad on his deathbed, and hadn’t seen him for probably more than 2 years when he died.  I’ve only just recently learned that he had MS, and then developed esophogeal cancer…the cancer I knew about, and I assumed that was the only cause for his death, but I guess not.  He had a long history of smoking and drinking, which I think is part of the reason my dad quit smoking when I was 3, and why he rarely touches alcohol.  My granddad had 6 brothers and 2 sisters.  All but 2 of the brothers died in their mid-sixties or earlier….my dad has made significant changes over the last decade, I would say, in order to ensure that that doesn’t happen to him.  He turned 52 last month, and does have various health problems; one of which is on his leg, related to some kind of parasite he contracted in Cyprus in the early 90s during the Gulf War.  The rest of which being due to his poor eating habits, and the years he DID smoke.  He also has type II diabetes, not to mention high blood pressure, cholesterol, etc…..it’s a wonder he gets around as much as he does, biking and so on.  I’ve gained a lot of respect for my dad in the last 2 or 3 years.

My mum is another story entirely, and both deserve entries of their own….but I just don’t have the time right now.

Melissa called me last night…and I think I was mistaken about her.  I’ll find out for sure tonight when I see her, but I think I’ve gathered that she lives with a guy who is either her boyfriend or husband, and she has two kids.  I’m more than happy to be her friend though!!  We talked for a good half hour last night, and I had only intended for it to be maybe a 5 minute convo about where to meet up tonight…apparently she got a job this week too.  Weird things like that have been happening all week.  I’ve now seen 6 or 7 people that I haven’t seen since grad at NSCC in ’06, ALL this week.  Maybe Thanksgiving weekend has something to do with it, but I’m certain that most of the ones I’ve seen didn’t leave the area, so it’s not like they’d be coming "home" from somewhere.  *shrug*  Oddness.  And I generally don’t go for horoscopes and things like that, but I’ve had some startlingly accurate ones in the last 4 weeks.

Phew.

I’ve got some calls to make and Sobeys stuff to read!

~SS