the reading

 in february i had my tarot cards read…and since then i’ve notcied that most of the predictions came true. whether it was through unconscious submission or that the psycic was correct, here they are.

 

…my fight with my parents. which is really a non-fight…but she said that it’s up to me to continue the dialouge and that if i meet them halfway with the expectations they have for me, we will all be happy…

well i started by moving home, but lots of other things. my parents and i get along now bettter than ever. because we are both making sacrifices.

 

 

…serious romance and said that it involved a period of five years that i have been waiting. she said that i am able to look at his faults and tolerate them rather than be blinded by all his good qualities…

five years of waiting? okay, holy shit. i’ve liked Jason for five years…random? I mean honestly, how wierd is it that he was my neighbor exactly five years ago.

 

 

…she was very sure about serious romance, very sure that adam was just my friend, and even more confident that the romance was who i suspected…

when she told me this, she said that it was someone i already knew. and i was foolish and interpreted it as a past boyfriend. ha, we all know that shit doesn’t work out. and adam, despite everything, is just my friend just like it should be.

 

 

 

…the cards that came up signified august, six months, the five year waiting(again), more about romance and the end of a battle…

i started working at ric’s in august. which is when jason and i started talking again, five years. five years. wow.
i’m already with him, so it’s not like i’m hoping or anything. i just cannot believe the cards were so close to my truth. or that i was so great at manipulating my thruth to fit the cards. wowie!

 

 

the rest of this entry is pretty personal, so if you have morals…stop reading.

so a little bit of background. jason is 23, works with me at ric’s and has never had sex. i am 20, in a relationship with jason and have had lots of sex. we’ve tried a few times, but just had problems. nervousness on both of our parts etc. and we also work together…so it seems like my co-workers know things about my relationship before i do. and i realize that jason is 23, and that all of his friends are my co-workers. and he can’t just lose his virginity and not tell anyone. mostly because thats just how boys are. and i’m not going to not let him tell his friends etc.

so last night jason and i had sex for the first time. and it was good, i mean, as good as one can expect, right?
except he’s so damn quiet! not a sound, so i can’t ever tell if it’s good, if he’s come etc. so i said the WORST THING POSSIBLE.

"wait, did you come already?"

OMG! I felt like such an asshole, but then i quickly tried to explain that it was because he was so quiet i had no idea. because it wasn’t too soon, but jeez. i’m a word clutz. 

but anyway, i knew he’d tell everyone at work. so after i took him to his car this morning, he had to work at 10. I rushed over to work and bought him a card that says "sorry for your loss" and on the inside i wrote "just kidding, i’m really not sorry at all"  then i told his friend ryan that when he walks in the door at 10 to have everyone give him a round of applause and give him the card. hopefully he’ll think it’s funny and not be pissed. and EVERYONE at work is going to find out anyways. so why not beat it to the punch? this way there are no rumors etc, just the truth.

so last night was good, and today will be busy. and hopefully my boyfriend won’t break up with me 😉