Did I overreact

Hey guys I know it’s been a while I been doing ok. Anyways this weekend is my birthday weekend and I wanted to go to a Hawaiian style dinner show because Mike would of taken me there this weekend. The last dinner show I went to I had to push it back a week because my mom made a big deal about  me going on my own so her and my dad ended up going. So I let her know I was going to one this weekend and of course she wanted to go but she wanted to know what kind of food they will have so I had to hold off booking and look into it but by the time I going to book both dinner shows were booked out. I caught a little attitude and told her I’ll book for next weekend then and she said she wanted us to do something with by brother since his birthday is next week then I was like fine I’ll make it for the week after then and I went in my room and cried myself to sleep because the one thing I wanted to do for my birthday I can’t. Last time I cried myself to sleep was about 3 to 4 weeks ago just because I missed Mike. The next morning I was like am I making this a bigger deal than it is? Does it matter when I go as long as I go?…I don’t know it just really affected me. My co-worker best friend says it is a big deal to me because I still miss Mike and going to the dinner show he would of taken me to is my way of feeling close to him, that does make sense to me because I still miss him everyday and wonder about his girls. So this weekend I will watch wrestling which usually take my mind off things and boost my spirit some but then I’ll probably do what I usually do clean the house go eat dinner somewhere with my parents and do nothing…maybe I’ll cry some more I don’t know but I know he wouldn’t want me crying my birthday weekend. You may ask how about my sister and friends well my sister usually does her own thing and my friends are in South Florida…so yeah.