It’s like addiction, it’s all I know.
I have been listening to this song over and over.. and I can’t stop. It brings tears to my eyes. For anyone looking for a sad.. feel sorry for yourself.. breakup song… I posted the link below haha. Sorry.. or you’re welcome.. However you want to look at it.
https://youtu.be/1Fxb52dHHgI
I haven’t been on here much lately.. I have been caught up with work and I started Crossfit this week. The first 4 sessions are working with a trainer one on one. He has really been kicking my ass. I didn’t realize how out of shape I was haha.. I also never realized how many different things go into lifting, with the form and breathing and placement.. It is insane. Can I also say that my legs and ass muscles are so sore. I struggle using the bathroom. I guess that means I did something right… right? I am extremely motivated to get better and get faster. I like being pushed and feeling like I accomplished something.
I still haven’t texted D back. After having such a nice conversation with him and him promising me that it would remain like that from now on.. then getting the cold shoulder the next day as I figured would happen.. It just took my motivation to build a friendship with him away. I don’t know, it was like a big turn off. And an even bigger turn off that he hasn’t even reached out to me. So I guess I am doing the right thing by just letting it go.
So now I am just sitting here.. staring at the screen, listening to the saddest songs I can find on YouTube and crying it out. I don’t cry much.. when I do it is such a great release for me.
I miss D. I miss our life. I miss the future we had planned together.
Now it’s nothing
And it means nothing to him
But everything to me..
Still
i feel this.
Warning Comment
You are doing the right thing no matter how hard it is. I heard cross fit is some serious stuff. All the best.
Warning Comment
Thanks for the song suggestion.
Warning Comment
My muscles hurt just from reading this, but that’s cuz I have zero muscles… according to my doctor. I really *need* to do something like this, but I’d be sucking on my inhaler something fierce lol.
Letting go of a relationship is so difficult. Crying it out is healthy. The release of tears is literal and a symbolic washing away of the ick that hurts us or makes us sick… just like regular water in a bath or shower. Cry until you’re ready to shut off the faucet. Nobody gets to judge how long that takes you.
Once you’re all sparkly and fresh again, as hard as it might be, try to shift your mindset. It’s okay to miss what you had, but it’s also okay to redesign your future. Look at this as an opportunity to do just that. You can do whatever you want or become whoever you want if you want to change things about yourself. Starting out on a new journey is scary, but you know it’s also exciting… seeing where the road will take you.
You get the do-over that so many people wish they got a chance to have! And we get to come along with you on that ride! Woohoo! Live vicariously through you! That’s the stuff. 😉
@caria Your notes really make me smile and laugh. Thank you for that! I am working on crying all of the feels out. It’s gonna take a while hahaha
@bru8282 I had this very cool note all written and then it disappeared. I hate it when it does that. l0l
I said something along the lines of asking if you had some bad weather coming up? No lightning. Lightning is bad. But a windy rainstorm would be tres awesome. Take your little self on out to the lake or the beach or somewhere private and then when the wind whips up and the waves crash, and perhaps even the thunder cracks… scream. Scream it out from the pit of your soul. Scream and cry and just use the sounds to represent all the feels you need to lose!
I promise, you will feel SO great after doing that. It won’t knock him out of your head, but it will sure make you feel pretty powerful and awesome and like you move forward and do anything!
Warning Comment