Can I stick to anything?!

The short answer:  No.

I am HORRIBLE, at making plans and never sticking to them.  I am getting much better about this when it comes to actual friends – but if I make a plan with myself, there is a 9/10 chance I won’t stick with.  I’ll use two examples; just in the past two weeks.

Two weeks ago, I had an opportunity to interview at a local (very large) university to be a part-time (But fully benefited!) admin assistant.  Basically, it would be a few steps down from my current career and my history, but most of you know how unhappy I am selling internet technology, currently.  Here I am; agreeing to a full panel interview… Friday.  At 4 pm.  In Big City.  Honestly, I never had a chance to be nervous for it, because I KNEW I WASN’T GOING TO GO!  NO ONE was relying on me.  My husband said it was a good opportunity to just interview; and hear them out.  However, because I have the worst anxiety ever and can’t calm down about anything, was completely stressed about it, overthinking it… you name it.

So he FINALLY got a day off (omg, his work schedule is absolute insanity) and he just told me not to go through with the interview.  There were a few red flags – for instance, I’m at a tech start-up now, which has resulted in one of the most lax, chill work environments I have ever experienced.  Unlimited PTO and sick time, wear jeans (or really, whatever the hell you want) to work, amazing pay and benefits, etc… and with the college, while it would have yielded great hours – part time – it most likely would have been back to dressing nice, strict hours, no unlimited time off, probably still good benefits… but yeah.  Probably not similar to anything that I am used to.

BUT – A LOT OF THESE QUESTIONS AREN’T ANSWERED – CUZ I DIDN’T GO TO THE DAMN INTERVIEW!  AND THAT’S WHAT INTERVIEWS ARE FOR!  UGH!!!

Anyway.  Deep down, I am kind of glad it didn’t work out – especially since… I have some MORE news to share.  In a few 🙂

Example #2:  Last week, I was contacted to participate in a focus group in Big City.  I of COURSE agreed to it last week – without mother f-ing thinking about it.  It pays $125 for 1.5 hours, really not bad… but the caveat is, it starts at 7:30 downtown Big City, when my house is about half hour (an hour in traffic) north of Big City.  Plus, I have to come take care of K (doggie) as well, so I just didn’t think about it.  At all.  So here I am, not going to this thing in order to make a few extra dollars.  I mean, I WILL say that the money is cool and all, but probably not worth the hassle of driving down there, parking, dealing with traffic, getting home at 10 pm, etc.  ESPECIALLY since I have a customer call at 7 am tomorrow!

I just am disappointed that I can’t stick with anything.  Ever.

*Sigh* hopefully I will learn my lesson eventually.  I told husband from now on, ANYTIME I am asked to commit to something, I am going to run it by him first before I say yes.  He says that will result in me being a lot less stressed.  I think he’s right.  🙂

Onto the “news” portion of this post… I’m not the ONLY one who hasn’t been enjoying their job the last few months.  My husband (Mitchell) has absolutely been loathing it.  Crazy enough, he’s not a job hopper like me – he’s been there 14 years.  He’s currently one of the youngest executive-level leaders in the nation.  It’s really impressive.  But boy – that place is TOXIC.  Constant downgrading.  No lifting of spirits or praise.  These people work 80-90 hour weeks, many days in a row, and upper-level management finds nothing but things to nit-pick and criticize.  Hubs can’t go to work without dealing with assholes, daily.  He’s “expired”, for lack of better words.  Mitchell’s former boss Tiger moved out of state to another area within the same type of work, and had kept in touch with Mitchell often, of course letting him know that he should look for opportunities where he is.

It’s almost like a sign from God came.

A company within Mitchell’s nationwide organization posted a job, THAT WEEK that he was feeling the lowest, that was exactly the title Mitchell had been seeking for the last year.  He wears MANY hats in his current role, but really wanted to focus on one aspect he really likes – and this job is that.  Mitchell thought, too good to be true… right?

This job would also be in the same town as Tiger, also within the same industry.  So of course Mitchell reaches out to Tiger to ask about this position, about working for this different organization, etc… Tiger, without skipping a beat told Mitchell to apply and he’d put in a good word as he’s good friends with the hiring manager, who is a vice president.

Mitchell got a call from him the next day.  Basically, the VP of this new organization told Mitchell he is SO excited to talk to him, and Mitchell is an industry expert and would bring in immense experience to this role.  He also said Tiger had nothing but good things to say about him.  Tiger is actually somewhat… um… famous?  He’s a well-known dude with a ton of friends in this particular industry.  He’s very well-respected, so his word goes a long way.

Anyway, Mitchell applied a week ago and has his first round of interviews this week!  He’s SO excited.  But what does that mean for me?  Packing up and moving across the country.  Seriously.

There are so many pros to this; and surprisingly, not as many cons as we thought.  For instance – we LOVE this are that we’d be moving to.  It’s f-ing CHEAP.  Houses are HALF of what they are here; not to mention, bigger, better, nicer weather, a little smaller city than what we are dealing with here.  But there are some pretty stark cons 🙁  IE – my parents just retired and me leaving them, Mitchell’s Mom and Sister are here, of course my brother is here, best friends, etc…. it’s heartbreaking to think about that aspect.  Obviously, I have a ton of plans this upcoming winter that will require me to fly back to Big City, but for the most part, it’s definitely sad to think I’d leave!

The biggest part about leaving is Big City, was my dream.  It’s home.  It’s been home to me more than where I grew up and went to High School.  I love every aspect of this place.  It is beautiful.  And will be incredibly hard to say bye too.  Oh, and we own our house here too, LOL.  Mitchell spoke with our real estate agent for awhile about this opportunity a few days ago – our agent said don’t sell!  So we’ll see.

I might be putting the carriage before the horse – but something tells me that Mitchell will be a late-round candidate for this role, so these are all things we need to think seriously about.  Honestly though – this particular organization that Mitchell is applying for, is well-known for being the best and brightest in all of his industry.  Solid leadership, great reputation, better benefits, and Mitchell will be actually starting his own department.

Anyway – that’s why I’m sticking around my current job, for now.  Because I might not be here in two months!

Honestly?  I’m ready for a new adventure.  We are young enough, no children, and I’m getting f-ing sick of the weather here in Big City anyway.  🙁

Well – there you go.  That’s my news.  Secondary, boy – lately, I have been seeing spots.  It’s happened to me in spurts in my life, I believe largely from low blood pressure.  It causes my vision to go blurry.  It’s super weird.  -_-

Anyway.  That’s what I have.  “TL;DR” since that’s what all the kids are doing these days – I can’t commit to plans, my husband could get a new job and completely uproot our life to another state, and I may or may not be drinking too much caffeine.  🙂

Much love, everyone!

~Elle.

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