Vicinity of Obscenity

I have to do something here.  I have to vent.  I have to purge what is boiling up inside of me.  The sad thing is, this should not be bothering me, as I was not even invited to the event causing the roiling emotions.  I saw an invitation to a social gathering on the front page of my Facebook.  Not realizing exactly what it was I clicked out of curiosity.  The social gathering was a farewall party of sorts, to be held at the somewhat uncontaminated lake near my Uni.  This is all grand.  This is fabulous, and nice.  I note that the party is being held by a group of college aged students who are all a part of a particular church group.  I have met this group, since one of my good friends (who is also my boyfriend’s roomate) is heavily involved with said group.  They are all very sweet, mostly girls with a scattering of guys.  They are all very close, and (the girls at least) are incredibly sheltered.   I have before and marveled at just how far they have gotten in life almost completely unscathed.  I say this to help you understand the mindset from which the following comes.  The following is what has engaged my ire:

Come hang out with us for our last event of the semester! There will be a boat ride for those who want to go tubing, and we’ll grill up some hamburgers and hotdogs for lunch. This will be a great break for everyone who is studying for final exams!

Ladies, let’s respect our guys and help them not to stumble– so if you have a two-piece swimsuit, make sure you wear a long tanktop or T-shirt over it while you swim.

I take no issue with the first part, the second part, however caused my mouth to drop open in disbelief.  I do believe I actually rubbed my eyes and re-read it.  At first I laughed, but then it began to really bother me.  The words wormed their way into my brain, and the thinking behind them began to either emerge, or warp into what has elicited my rather fearsome outrage (I am a redhead, after all). 

"Let’s respect our guys and help them not to stumble" 

Apparently, in order to respect a man, you have to cover yourself.  Apparently if these girls do not cover themselves the boys will stumble.  Now, if these boys do stumble, because some wayward girl was not covered up, it is obviously not his fault.  That is where my problem comes in.  I know that it was innocently said, and that I am no doubt reading too much into it.  But to me this is the same thinking that excuses rapists because the girl was "asking for it" with her choice of clothing.  It is the same thinking that lets extremists sleep at night because the girl or woman they beat or executed was obviously immoral and dangerous.  It wasn’t the mens fault they couldn’t show restraint, she was wearing something provacative or revealing. 

Not only does this seem like dangerous thinking to me, but I cannot comprehend how assuming the "guys" will stumble is showing them respect.  Do you really show that you respect a guy by excusing him from all responsibility?  How are you respecting a guy when you assume they cannot handle themselves in a situation that involves a bathing suit? 

So yes, please respect all the weak, powerless guys who are not able to make a conscience decision.  If they see a girl in a two piece they will probably do something horrible, but of course it won’t be their fault.  They are incapable of showing restraint, its not their fault… really.

This has really gotten me pissed.  So pissed my arguments are not nearly as biting as they could be.  I tend to have this problem.  I apparently become amusing when I get enraged.  Especially if I am spewing at you in person.  I cannot count the times my mother has cried from laughing during one of my VERY PASSIONATE tirades.

But seriously.

East Texas/Bible belt it may be.  That is fucking ridiculous.  If that’s respect, count me out.  If you’re looking for me this weekend, I would check the lake.  I’ll be the one in bikini.  Or you know, nature’s bathing suit.

(Side note: Before any of you get excited, the above was completely facetious.  I do not like sun.  I do not like bathing suits, and there is no way in hell I would go naked.  But it made the point, didn’t it?)