Greener Pastures

Why is it that the grass is ALWAYS GREENER?!  Omg.  I cannot simply get over this at all.   I have the debilitating psychological conundrum that any current situation I am in – someone has it better.  Then, I take all of these drastic steps to get to the next place, which results in my constantly second guessing myself.  Because, guess what?!  Even for a moment, I realize that the grass is already pretty damn green where I’m at.

FOR INSTANCE – my work life.

Let me say, that compartmentalizing is not a skill I was born with… or a skill that I could ever probably have.  I am the worst.  If some teensy part of my life is going poorly, or less than to my liking (because let’s be real, I am very blessed) – it affects EVERY aspect of my life.  And the one place where this seems to pose the biggest problem is my work.

I was promoted in June to a new role where I am selling a technological product full time.  I’ve mentioned this in previous posts – but it is a role that is GOOD for me, has pushed me out of my comfort zone, is pretty easy and non-demanding, unlimited PTO and great benefits, no nights, evenings, weekends, what have you.  But what I’m not necessarily loving, of course, is the selling aspect.  I am just too damn nice to be pushy.  Regardless, there are quotas but not necessarily ones that we have to “hit” – for instance, if you’re cool and you work hard, you’re good.

GRASS = GREEN – but I don’t see it that way!

There are aspects I don’t like, of course, and I often times find myself tripping up over these minute things.  1) It’s a lot of technological knowledge that’s tough to grasp. It’s hard to understand!  2)  It obviously involves selling which isn’t my forte.  I’m a pushover.  3)  Talking to strangers?  On a PHONE CALL?  BOO.

But honestly… the people are great, it’s super flexible, my boss isn’t pushy, UNLIMITED PTO… all that good stuff.  Wear jeans to work.  I mean there are so many good parts about this that if I left, I might be making a mistake?

So here’s where it gets interesting – like a month ago, before I left for Europe, I applied for a part-time but FULLY BENEFITED HR job at a local university.  Seems fairly easy… heavily HR focused, which would be good for me to get my feet wet.

Anyway, of course I get a full interview – and for fuck sake, it’s a panel.  Why do people do these things?!  I HATE panel interviews.  SO. Much.  LOL.  Anyway – I’m motivated because I would LOVE to get back into HR and of course work part-time… like seriously?!  Isn’t that a dream!

But of course, it’s a University so I’d probably have to say goodbye to unlimited PTO, the benefits would probably be kick-ass but no more dressing like a hobo like I do now… might have to type out some pros and cons of this so I can go in, prepared. I’m ready for me to be happy in what I’m doing.  I’m not sure if that’s my current job, and maybe I am not giving it enough credit, or if I actually really don’t want to do this.

Time will tell.

Anyway – let me know your advice.  Go for this new opportunity?  Or realize I have it pretty good now?

Much love,

-Elle.