Ear’s on the Mend!

Monday, 3 am
Listening to: "Drive (Far Away)" (acoustic) by The Deftones

The pain in my ear is slowly fading.. the itch & the liquid-y feeling is still there. If I cup my right ear, it still sort of sounds like I’m under water. I called into work b/c I woke up feeling pretty dizzy & crappy. They were none too happy about it. Like I planned it or something b/c it was Valentine’s day. Whatever. Let people think what they want. I find myself caring less & less.

This is my quiet song. It’s only to be played late at night when I’m alone & the lights are turned down low.

Shaun’s giving me crap that the fact that Erica & I don’t get along is bumming Jon out. Truth is, Jon’s just pissed at me b/c I don’t like Erica. I refuse to be around here b/c I feel like I’ve already wasted enough of my life having to be annoyed by morons. I guess he wants to date her now (as opposed to using her for an easy lay). Shaun said something about what would I do if Erica & Jon were still together a month from now. I shrugged. I think he often forgets that Jon’s HIS best friend, not mine. Besides, I’m tired of the whole Rebecca/Jon/Erica drama. I rarely even think about Erica now that she’s no longer living below me. I think I’ve been good enough not to trash her when Jon brings her up.

I hate when people expect me to be nice to someone when I can’t stand them. I’m not fake like so many others. If I don’t like you & you don’t leave me alone, I’m going to let you know it. This is not to say that I trash everyone… just people others force me to be around all the time.

Anyway, I’m starting to feel like I’m back in junior high amongst all my feuding friends so enough w/that.

Going back to work tomorrow for sure. Thank god. I’ve begun to have a touch of cabin fever.. sad when I welcome the idea of going back to that corporate fast food shit hole. LOL

I think I’m going to crash out. I’ve been sleeping a lot since I went to the doctor on Friday night. It’s good b/c my body really needs it. Been having good dreams (bittersweet) lately. So that’s nice for a change. Haven’t had a single nightmare in two weeks. Feel nervous & twitchy a lot when I’m awake though. Odd.

Peace.