If wine were water this is what I wouldd say

How can I tell you this? How can I make this not abrasive? I love you (so much for not abrasive huh?). I am sorry, God you have no idea how sorry I am. I know by telling you this one of 2 things can happen… #1~ you will be so put back by all of this and wean me off of you, you will be kind because this is your nature. You will be so nice to me as it happens, I will be wondering why you want to spend less and less time with me and why you do not respond to my messages but I will still love you through all of this, but you will fade, my love will go to waste and our friendship that I cherish so much will be gone. Or #2 you will change your mind and tell me you want to give us a try, but because we are both so scared of love we will mess it up so quickly . One of the two of us probably me will be crushed.

 

Wow, huh that was a lot to lay out there huh? Well Andrew, I like you, and when it comes down to it I want to give it a chance. Yes we may screw up in fact we will! I just know though that something about the two of us is different. We can make this world work for each other. I love you, I care deeply for you. Honestly I feel for you the way I felt for Josh but you, you are a better love. You Andrew, you are a love I am not scared of, a love that if we went for it, there would be no “roll playing” no leverage. We can come from a “lets be honest with art and love place” I know how flowery that my sound to you but, how else should I say it?  I love you…. it comes from friendship, my love.

 

The sad part in all of this is you will never know, because I am on open diary. I am a coward, or a fool. I told you I had a crush on you and you responded with friendship and facebook. I still like you, I love you. first as a friend but then as someone I can trust with myself.. I wish you were here right now holding me. I don’t want to settle, I want you. Please stop flirting and playing games, just tell me why you hold me the way you do and why you get so close to kissing me but let go. Please, if you care for me, don’t let me down. please. I admit it! I like you! I want to try growing with you a shot! What are you waiting for Andrew?!

warm regards,

Your Best Friend

 

 

 

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