Free

I am a skinny thirteen year old boy sitting atop my favorite horse, Cochise, a coal black appaloosa with a white spotted blanket and we are looking over a fresh field of prairie grass that rolls away into the far horizon. I feel electric bursts of excitement fire through his body causing him to quiver and eagerly prance sideways. Riding without a saddle, I squeeze my bare legs tighter around his ribs. His sweat stings into my pores. It has been a long winter and now spring has rejuvenated us both. Cochise is ready. I am ready. Tilting my head skyward and filling the heavens with my best Indian war whoop I loosen the reins and tap his sides, giving Cochise his liberty. Before my next heartbeat we are flying over the green sea of life stretched out before us, blazing in a thunderous explosion that causes the world to blur. As the wind whips over my face I smile from the center of my soul, knowing that this moment is the very moment when I am as free as I will ever be.
I am a thirty-something year old man sitting in traffic, just trying to make it home. Thoughts of unhappiness, of failure, commandeered my state of mind. Work had been brutal and my wife and I were enduring the last spasmatic curtain call of our marriage. I looked around at some of the other drivers and only saw the same discontentment and frustration molding their posture and soaking into their hearts. It is a long way from where I am to where I thought that I would be at this time in my life. It has been a tedious, lonely journey home, and my thoughts are dark as I pull into the driveway. The grass needs mowing, the porch needs painting, and the house is way too small. My frown opens the door and I step inside and…suddenly…my world is changed. Two tiny faces come running towards me, happiness shining from their eyes and laughter carrying them across the room. In unison, I hear my daughters call to me, “Daddy’s home!” As I kneel to embrace them, I smile from the center of my soul, knowing that this moment is the very moment when I am as free as I will ever be.
I am a forty six year old man walking through the woods near my home. The two cats that have generously allowed me to be their personal servant are padding along behind me. I find a log that is soaking in the suns warmth and accept its invitation to sit and contemplate for a bit. I forget about the bills that I need to pay and the hurry-scurry of everyday responsibilities. I forget about the years that have danced slowly into the past. I forget about turbulent wasted nights and regrettable words that I have spoken and dreams I never held onto. Instead, I tilt my head skyward and fill the heavens with a silent prayer of thanks. I convey my heartfelt gratitude for all that I have been through and for all I will go through as I write the story of my life with each new day. As I offer my homage to the Good Lord above I cannot help but to smile from the center of my soul, knowing that this moment is the very moment when I am as free as I will ever be.
Take care.