The Seven Lazy Sins

Ah, movies.  The lifeblood of any (not quite) normal person’s weekend.  After going a pretty decent while without watching any, I’ve suddenly watched something like five in the last three or four days.  Probably has something to do with getting even more movie channels, plus being able to record stuff and watch it later quite easily.  Yeah, that’s pretty much entirely it.  Now for some reviews……

I’ll start with The Machinist.  This is a pretty good puzzler of a flick starring Christian Bale.  If more people had seen this movie, it would’ve been a star-maker (though his next movie did that for him alright….this little thing called Batman Begins….you might’ve heard of it).  He looks like a walking corpse.  At one point, he writes down that he weighs 120 pounds, and it seems pretty legit, because there’s nothing there but skin, bones, and hair.  Kind of gross.  Anyway…  The story centers on the physical and mental deterioration of a machine worker (that’d be Bale) who hasn’t slept in a year.  This is done sometimes rather hilariously through Reznik being awakened by a noise as he’s about to fall asleep.  The movie ends up finding Trevor Reznik trying to piece together his life and remember why it is he hasn’t slept in so long.  Weird things happen, secrets are revealed, the end.  I don’t want to give it away.  Just because I figured it out halfway through doesn’t mean I should spoil it.  The shame of it is that movies like this can’t be made anymore without being accused of ripping off Fight Club.  It sucks because the two movies share practically nothing in common, but the comparison will always be made.  I guess that’s what happens when a classic is born.  To conclude, I give The Machinist high marks and suggest anyone see it…….unless you’d rather not think while watching a movie.  If that’s you, then go watch Surf Ninjas or something.

Hmm…  Then again….you don’t really have to make a classic movie to get it ripped off.  Just look at how Cars rips off a piece of complete and utter garbage like Doc Hollywood.  Creativity really is theft anymore.  Sheesh.

Anyway.  To proceed…..

I watched Underworld:  Evolution again a few nights ago.  Yeah, it’s still frustrating in it’s lack of fulfillment.  It’s just a waste.  Such promise wasted.  I compare it to The Matrix Reloaded…..a great, promising first movie that is tarnished by the waste that is the sequel.  Evolution has its good points (I’ve covered all this before, so I won’t bother again), but they’re just outweighed by the bad, and by a wide margin.  If they bother to make a third one, it’s just going to be so they can milk the dried out cash cow.  And, of course, I’ll go see it.  Because I’m an idiot.

Just a little while ago, I watched Sin City.  Now that’s how a good movie is made.  The visuals are stunning (a good use for green screen?  Quick!  Someone show this movie to George Lucas so he can see how proper backgrounds are done in CG!!).  The cast is absolutely loaded.  The highest marks are reserved for Mickey Rourke as Marv, Benecio del Toro as Jacky-Boy, and Rosario Dawson as Gail.  The even higher marks are reserved for Clive Owen as Dwight.  He was flat out awesome, which, of course, isn’t surprising.  The guy is a freakin’ genius of an actor….well, when he wants to be anyway.  Even though the movie is mostly a collection of short stories, none seem out of place.  Probably has something to do with all of them overlapping a little.  Or maybe it has to do with the brilliant writing of Frank Miller or perhaps the editing and direction of Robert Rodriguez.  Or maybe it’s just brilliant overall.  Yeah, that’s the one.  Brilliant!  If you haven’t seen this already……….do yourself a favor and watch it.  Right now.

The other stuff I watched this weekend was The Incredibles and Ying Xiong.  I’ve seen them both a number of times (well, maybe I’ve seen Ying Xiong a rather LARGE number of times…….but what can I say, it’s fucking brilliant).  The Incredibles is such a great movie.  Why is it no one can make a live action super-hero movie this good?  Baffling.  By the way, I leave the Spider-Man series out of that argument……it’s in a class of its own.  In this category, I mean stuff like Fantastic Four, Daredevil, The Punisher…….that kind of middling shit.  The stuff that should’ve been better, but wasn’t.

Also sitting recorded on the DVR to be watched is the Cary Grant-Irene Dunne classic The Awful Truth.  This movie is the grandaddy of modern romantic comedy.  I can’t tell people enough times that practically every single romantic comedy made in the 80’s, 90’s, and 00’s is just ripping off this movie in some manner.  And let me not forget to mention that The Awful Truth is still hilarious now, even about 70 years later.

Now Playing in Dave’s Mental Jukebox:  "Our Truth" by Lacuna Coil, "Revolution Deathsquad" by DragonForce, and "Hate Me" by Blue October

I’ve also been watching tons of World Cup soccer (I practically haven’t moved from the couch this weekend……..you can tell…..).  The big stars so far have been Trinidad and Tobago (earning a draw with mighty Sweden, even playing a man down the entire second half), Mexico (just destroying Iran), and The Netherlands (it wasn’t a big margin, but they dominated Serbia/Montenegro).  The United States plays in about 12 hours.  I’m gonna try to catch glimpses on the TV’s out on the sales floor at work tomorrow, but I’ll have it recorded as well.  Can’t wait!

I guess that’s about enough.  I’m anxious to get to doin’ some reading on A Long Way Down.  Either that, or I’m gonna go play some more X-Men Legends II.  Or mayhaps I’ll just go to sleep.  Ok, so I won’t do that, but it was worth saying for a laugh.  Who the fuck sleeps at this time of night?  It’s only 11 of the clock!  Alright, alright.  I’ll shut up now, as I should’ve done minutes ago.  I just can’t keep myself from monologuing.  As Casey Jones said in the Ninja Turtles movie, "Ah…..it’s a talent."  And with that, I go.

Sayonara.