Catching Up

I haven’t written in here in a while and I figured it was about time.  Things have been going extremely well.  I have finally found the love of my life.  It’s weird, I always knew what I wanted to do with my life, but I never actually saw it happening.  Now that I have him, it feels so much less scary to do the things I want.  He’s always there to make me feel amazing.  I never thought I’d find someone who cares about me so much.  It’s just so weird because I don’t care about myself at all so I don’t see how someone else could care so much.

So basically, I’ve been going nowhere weight-wise.  My medication makes me feel blah and apathetic about life and myself.  I have more motivation to go to classes and work, but no motivation to eat less or exercise.  I need the medicine for anxiety but I almost miss the purging.  I purged to calm my anxiety, but now that I don’t have any, I have no need to do it.  I don’t miss the isolated feeling that came along with living in my head, but at the same time, I feel nostalgic thinking about it.  I don’t really know what I’m rambling on about, honestly.  I think I’m just wired from the huge coffee I just had.