Angels are Savors!
Online movies suck. They always limit your time you get to watch..so pretty much you get to watch one movie per link..which sucks concidering half the links never fucking work and I fuckd up my clicking something and now I have to wait ANOTHER hour to be able to go back and watch the rest of a movie I started Last night…damn.
I’m in an odd kind of mood, I am dying for affection, but honestly cant stand to be touched right now. I guess I feel kind of alone, in the love department because I don’t want to be lovely with my girlfriend because of left of anger from the 2 hour fight this morning. Which I am entirely getting sick of doing. Kinda of sick of not being listened to, or our conversations not being remembered, just everything in general. I’m dying to start working, money, money, money. It’s all I can think about. I have so much I need money for I dont even know what to do. I’m trying to prioritize everything to make sure that whats needs to be taken care of first gets taken care of first and not mixed up between needs and wants. On top of wanting to work for money, I want to work for space, space from Alyda. Constantly being here not going any where is almost as bad as sitting in a jail cell letting everything eat away at my mind. I need to create a life for myself. Very soon, I feel like I’m turning into a mad man.
My constant eating has slowed down alot, which its starting to baffle me on what the hell is going on. for weeks I’ll eat every 30 minutes if not sure, then Suddenly I’ll start eating like I am no two or three meals a day. So I’m glad it has slowed down, I was begining to lose my figure. I hate that I dislike cold weather so much, I really want to run and get my ass back into shape. I was doing so well seeing great results and now ugh i dont know it’s a mess.
I’m getting more and more testy as the days pass, and I cant say its because of lack of sleep I have been getting a fair amount…well or it could just be the fact that I’m finally adjusting to the amount that I do get. I have been getting up earlier even though I have been going to bed at the same general time, if not a little earlier or later. So I’m glad it’s some sort of sleep schedule..may not be the best one to be on, but its a constant, and I love things that are just constant and steady..not a big fan of change…
(It’s really hard to function with 4 bandaid’d fingures out of ten, ugh I wish this stuff worked instantly)
Wow Amy just got online, she has been on in almost a week and a half. I really miss her Trin and ma. Kinda the family I never really had/ always wanted. I’m glad she got online though I havnt talked to her in a while and I jsut want to know how everything is going with her. Last I hear Adem left, ma was upset about it, Big titty Step was moving in, and now her uncle. The house is getting full apperently. I really miss trin, my name (squish…dnt ask random nickname) was one of the first names she ever said. I’m alot like her father figure..so I’m told. Which I’m very glad her biological father (though I havenver met) seems like a piece of shit. I know for a fact I’m a decent father figure.
(Apperently the internet liked to me Tonight ep of "Vampire diaries" isnt a new one..oops sorry Brooke)
(Erin left…SCORE HALO HERE I COME!!!)
Monica Is my savior recently. I have talked to her almost everyday all day. A-M-A-Z-I-N-G. The only way i can put, glad we started talking again. she makes me feel loved, supported, and cared about. idk.
Cassies finally dropping of my binder tomorrow so I have it for orientation on monday. 13 days until court, 15 days til christmas….jesus…where did the fucking year go.
I feel bad for Brooke, I dont know how to make her feel better. Shes going through alot with family deaths, and sickness’s. She could really use a break. I just dont know how to do that for her…..sorry…im at a loss of how to make her feel better.
Hung with Pam the other day which was good i really missed her. I also talked to Val and Dre which I havn’t talked to either of them for a while since right after Aug wen I first got kicked out of Bounce.
Without music I’d be at a loss.
Recently favorite songs, Lonely, better today, the truth all by ne-yo..sean kingston why you wanna go, aight oh aight you steff ft plies, jesse mccartney told you so….thats all for now have to get dressed…going out…damn sorry Halo but we will need to reshedule our time together….lol
Oh…haha found a way to figure "the secrets" out…..hahaha got i love being able to hack shit. "hes" fucked..im tired of the crap!
D.j