Here I am…

Photo relates to nothing.  It’s an old one from Lacrosse or maybe Rochester.  Probably Lacrosse.  I’ve lost my love of photography.  It has to do with time.  I’m not who I used to be and I don’t care about what I used to care about.  When I come here to write, I don’t care very much either.  It’s only me and it’s only what it is and it’s not much.

It’s been a year now since I quit working.  It’s been a year now since I got my odd disease.  I shuffle the time and how I feel together and I do not like the results.  I can reshuffle but I doubt I’d like those results any better.

It’s always all about me.  Always has been.  Always will be.  I am the center.  Revolve around me if you please.

I had intended to write about the weekly themes.   I thought if I do nothing else I will have done that.  But then I lost a couple months to a bad computer and now I’ve lost a couple weeks to my own neglect.  I remember two I missed – ancestors and food.  Food is current.  So I guess I only remember ancestors.

Mine were mainly Irish.  Mine were mainly farmers.  I assume they worked hard, in fact I know they did.  I know where some of them are buried.  I visited the cemetery last summer and was disappointed.  The tombstones had lichens on them and could not be read.  I don’t remember them being that way.  It was like my past is no longer carved – it’s obscured.  And of course it matters as much as it doesn’t matter.

Life is like that.  It lasts forever and then it’s over.  What we thought would last doesn’t.  What we are left with isn’t real, it’s dreams in dark nights.

This of course is nonsense.  It relates to close to nothing.  I’m sorry I’m not more lucid.  I will try to be better next time.

Meanwhile…..

Oh, apples, chunky peanut butter and whole wheat bread.