Day 1

Day 1 of Lupron down. In a hotel room in Canada without an alcohol swab, but it is done.

I scoffed a little as I stabbed myself with the 28 gage 1/2 inch needle, which now seems as common place as brushing my teeth. I very clearly remember the very first Lupron injection. I was sweating and nauseous. It took me half an hour and at least five “okay,okay…I got this…this is it….1, 2, 3…..nope, I don’t got this…” attempts before I managed to give myself a messy, painful injection. There was bruising, blood, tears, and a staunch belief that there was no way I could do this night after night.

Countless injections, many, much larger, needles, and several much more stingy burny drugs later, the Lupron is nothing.

Minor pinch and a dull residual sting that hurts less than flicking yourself with your fingers.

Incidentally,  “They don’t know, for example, that one drug commonly used to suppress ovarian function— leuprolide acetate (Lupron ™)— has never been approved by the FDA for this purpose.” Miriam Zoll is full of interesting facts like that, some of which I wish I was still blissfully oblivious to, in her book “Cracked Open: Liberty, Fertility, and the Pursuit of High Teach Babies.”

An interesting and informative book. I would read it either when deciding to jump on the IVF rollercoaster, or when struggling with when to get off because you are dizzy and nauseous. I would not recommend it for the middle of the rollercoaster ride; when you are mid double upside down loop, focusing on not throwing up your cotton candy, and trying not to smack your head against the padded restraints. This book will not help you maintain the type of focused  optimism necessary to believe that all the stabbing and soul crushing anxiety is worth it.