Happy Idleness

Can’t finish my thoughts, I keep wanting to expand and expand, giving more and more context, examples and inter-tying theories and at about the 6000 word mark I have so much information already expressed that trying to keep things relevant and continuing to involve the aforementioned information requires actual editing which ruins the flow of the writing and then it feels overly contrived and dear lord it’s just unending rubbish.

So, here are some words that I don’t expect to finish.

Holding hands is nice isn’t it? One of those simple pleasures.

Satisfaction is complex isn’t it? I am a, content person, this is something I’ve worked towards and I enjoy. It’s not an elation or anything like that, in simple vague terms it’s about finding contentment in a situation, discerning something that you find positive and settling upon that as the primary force of the idea. It is what stops me from being abjectly cynical, it’s important to be critical but, on a person to person basis, it’s more important to avoid becoming abjectly cynical. When the approach to a situation is laden with fear, dread, concern and so forth the focus shifts away from the positive outcomes to negative outcomes, so for instance the idea of going to a party means the focus is now more on the possibility of it being unpleasant rather than enjoyable, focusing on the bad outcomes and not the good.

There is no distinct and compelling reason to try and be positive, there is nothing so convincing one can simply read it in a book, study the formula and then live by it, nothing that convenient or easy, you’ve got to want to be happy.

A lot of people don’t want to be happy.

A lot of people.

Obligation drives people to it, whilst some enjoy pity and others martyrdom, which I mean in a good sense, as in ‘I’d prefer to bear this weight rather than have them bear it.’ There are those who feel they function better when they’re unhappy, usually as a result of stress, for instance the hardest working person I’ve ever known functions on stress, and if she was happy she would be lazy because it’s her stress that pushes her, that compels her to do her work.

That’s not to say happiness and success are separate.

Happiness is selfish, even if, as in my case, the times I am happiest are when the people around me are happy, that’s still my selfish desire, and I work towards my desires to benefit me, it is purely incidental that there might be any spillover into others.

Some people are happy when those around them suffer or are unfortunate or are less happy than they are. This person is also selfish, and they also work towards their desire without informing those around them. Objectively there’s nothing between that person and I.

Motivation is such a powerful force, when trying to understand someone else it is important to focus on their motivations, rather than their actions, in most cases I believe. We do not live such exciting lives that this means every day they might kill an animal out of sympathy so we don’t need universal rules in these circumstances, circumstances tend to making ‘universal rules’ rather obtuse anyhow.