Silly Little Boy

Things aren’t the way I remember them, the people aren’t either. Maybe it’s aging, getting towards the mid-twenties, I’m still just a high school kid who likes looking at nature and talking to people, I don’t feel any vast difference, I had a firm idea of myself and still do, but there has been an attitude shift which I’m not sharing, that it’s important now to look at one’s own social structure, where they’re going and who they’ll become, not necessarily who they are. Friends become more judgmental, it used to be you wouldn’t befriend someone if they’re a bad person or there just isn’t any interest, but now I’ve observed people whom shared my point of view in the past, that will now look at how much the other person is earning, what prospect their career has, what they’ve accumulated, how much respect is owed to them considering their jobs, or social standing. These are superfluous things, they aren’t indicative of the person, they, in my opinion, shouldn’t be what one uses as a guide for prospective friends, prospective anythings.

I wonder if it’s just that this is what people do at this age, maybe in 10 years they’ll be doing something different again, a different template for a different year, but that’s a dangerous idea as it underestimates them, as it implies they’re simply doing what is popular now, as being honest to your emotions, sincere in your approach to people was popular in one’s late teenage years. One can be confident that in universities the world over, the majority of students will be politically left, it’s been that way for 50 years, it’s a fad, people change from it when they leave university, not all but many.

I don’t know. I remember having to fight with teachers, even my parents, because the people I liked were considered to be of a low level, that if I lay down with dogs I’ll get fleas I was told, I believe vehemently that a person’s worth is not in their career or social standing, but maybe, as it has been in many other instances, that it was just a small percentage of the populace who really believed that, the same way almost everyone will tell you they appreciate honesty, but they don’t, they appreciate honesty when it is agreeable to them.

Even at my age it’s disappointing how many people simply can’t reconcile themselves with a person who has different beliefs/opinions, particularly in the case of a value judgment, it’s outside the realm of reason to posit one to be right and another wrong, perhaps the evidence one can supply might be greater for one or the other, but that doesn’t make it unassailable, nor does it make the other one wrong. It’s simplistic but I believe it’s important to be able to understand another person’s opinion even if I don’t agree with them.

It’s easy to call people cynical, jaded, naive, insular, primarily I suppose what I’m trying to say is, I think it’s important to believe and trust one’s friends, to trust what they tell me, it shouldn’t be done at face value though, but if they can explain it, and they say they are being sincere I will trust the person, I can have doubts about it, but I fucking trust them, it’s a respect thing too, I don’t expect them to lie to me, I don’t expect them to deceive me, why would I? They’re my friends for fuck’s sake.

I’m treated like I’m this naive idealist… Because I believe something they never truly believed… But like I said, I can understand and respect even if I don’t agree… So why can’t they?