I’m Finally Writing Something
Ok, well I know for a fact I’m going to miss a lot to details about things that have happened. Since it’s been pretty much four months since I’ve written an actual entry in here.
Blackbird, the play I stage managed went pretty well. The show at least. Audience wise not so good. We had to cancel several shows due to no audience, and that is really sad. Both Jim and Krista did an amazing job. And we may get a chance to do the show again at Fringe sometime.
I went with Jason to Mega Con. The convention he always goes to. I got to go since we had a show canceled that day. OY. But I spent the entire weekend at Jason’s house. Which was very nice. Especially since he took off from work, so yep, I got to spend the entire night with him both nights I stayed over. That was quite a treat since I usually end up sleeping alone while he’s at work. The following day after my show ended we went to Disney and renewed our Disney passes. Yay! We have Seasonal passes again!
I can’t really remember what happened after that for a bit. Oh, Brian’s birthday, April 1st, his girlfriend Jessica had a surprise party for him. Jason and I went. It was very crowed at her little tiny apartment house.
So, Jason and I celebrated our two year anniversary. We celebrated by having me spend the night at his house the night before and the night of. So it was like a mini vacation that he had to work through. Oy. But we went to The Melting Pot for dinner, which was very yummy as always. And then we went to Downtown Disney. I don’t remember the exact details but I got upset about something and I was crying and things weren’t to exciting after that. And I think that also started the rest of the sad news that I will get into in a bit.
Two nights before Relay for Life, I was talking to Jason online asking him if I could come over, and he said he wanted to be alone, and that made me a little upset cause I wanted to see him. After we were talking for a little bit he told me he didn’t know if things would work between us anymore. And if we could really be together forever like we’ve been talking about. I totally broke down crying thinking he was breaking up with me. He said I could come over the next day after I was done work if I wanted to talk about it. I went to bed, but I couldn’t sleep. I just kept crying. Well, I finally went and woke up my mom and told her what Jason said about him not being sure if he wanted to be with me anymore. And after about an hour of that I tried to get to sleep. I couldn’t eat anything when I woke up and got ready for work. I felt so sick. And Kristin was at work and I was just all sad and crying in the break room. But she asked me what was wrong and I told her, and she couldn’t believe it. She kept saying what would Jason do without me. But I talked to Jason during my break, and he acted like everything was fine, and told me to come over after I was done. So I did, and we talked and we both cried and we worked everything out. I was just really confused as to why he felt that way all of a sudden.
Relay for Life was a lot of fun this year. And Blair was on our team as well. Yay. I started setting up the tent and then Jason came and helped me finish putting it up. We did a lot of stuff, I did the night time zoo tour twice. And Jason got a lot of good pictures. And Kristin’s boyfriend David, dressed up for the Miss Relay Contest. He looked really pretty. Haha. And the best thing about the entire event, my mom was there the entire time. Well, my dad took her home around 8 in the morning, cause she was so tired, but she was there for the whole thing pretty much.
Well, another really hard time for me came a week after Relay. I guess Jason never really got over thinking about us not being together anymore. One night that I thought everything was fine, I went to his house after I was done work that night, and he even joined me for dinner on my break. We were talking and he got really quite and I asked him what was wrong and he said he talked to his dad. And he told him he didn’t know what he wanted anymore and if he wanted to be with me anymore, and his dad apparently told him to do what he thinks is best and to not lead me on if he doesn’t think it will work between us. I broke down crying. And I couldn’t even stay in there anymore, I went outside and sat in my car crying. I couldn’t even drive away. I called my mom and told her Jason was breaking up with me and I didn’t know what to do and I couldn’t drive. I then sent Kristin a text message telling her and I guess her and her mom went in and talked to Jason. About an hour later or so, Jason came outside and I just kept crying asking him why, and he said it’s just best for both of us. NO! It’s not! Everything was fine between us, why would he think that. He let me back inside and I was looking at the scrapbook I made for him for our one year anniversary. I was crying the entire way home. And when I got home my mom woke up and came into my room to talk to me. And then things got even worse when she told me that her and my dad consider there marriage to be pretty much over. NO! That’s not what I want to hear! I had such a bad night. And it continued into the next day. Before I went to work Jason got online and I told him not to leave me and he said he can’t help it. While I was at work I kept crying and everyone kept asking me if I was ok. NO, I wasn’t ok. I was losing the love of my life and my parents. I was talking to Jason while on my break and he told me he was with Chris and he told him everything. And I asked him if he still wanted me to come over after work to talk or just get my stuff there and he said ok. When I got to his house, and went into his room I went to grab my stuff and he stood up and I grabbed him and hugged him so hard and started crying. And I just kept telling him to not leave me and we can work everything out. And I’ll play video games with him. He doesn’t have to leave me for someone more like him that he wants. After I did my long cry, he finally started to talk and tell me that Tim called him. I forgot I sent Tim a message that morning telling him about Jason wanting to leave me. Well, Tim is now my best friend. He told Jason exactly what I told him, but since it came from someone else, he listened. He said we can work it out, and he never wanted to leave me, he just didn’t think it would work for us to be together forever. But now he realized that it can work between us. WOW!! He still wants me! I told him I haven’t been able to eat all day and he said he wanted me to eat, so he ordered us a pizza cause he said it’s a special occasion, we are starting over again. I started feeling so much better. I thought my life was ending cause I wasn’t going to be with him anymore. He still loves me!
The following week Jason had me shave his hair off. Oh my! He said if we are going to get married I’m going to be the one to do that. It was so hard at first, I love his hair, why does he always want to shave it off! Well, I&nbs
p;did it, and he was so happy.
Fringe 2009 came and gone so fast! OH it was so much fun! Jason and I both submitted art for Visual Fringe again. My mom was excited since she would get to attend this year. We both volunteered. We all saw many wonderful shows. Fringe is totally one of my favorite times of the year.
Well, I didn’t do too bad updating. I know I left a lot of stuff out, but I just can’t remember everything. Oh, well, Saturday is my parents 33rd Anniversary. I wanted to do something special for them, and hope maybe they will stay together forever. And I’m sending them on a 3 night cruise. They leave tomorrow. They are both really excited about it. I know my mom is superly excited. I hope they have a lot of fun.
That is all for now. I just feel better getting this updated. I need to find a better job. I would really like a theatre job. But who knows. UCF won’t take me back into the BFA Stage Management program. I’m apparently too good for them. I don’t know. Whatever. I just really need to make money, cause TJ Maxx and SAK aren’t paying my bills. And I really need to make money cause I’m not planning on living at this apartment anymore after next February when it comes time to resign the lease.
Ok, well that is all for now!
-StarBright16