What have we done to each other?

“I suppose these questions stormcloud over every marriage: What are you thinking? How are you feeling? Who are you? What have we done to each other?” –Gillian Flynn

Every marriage accumulates these little slights, let downs, ways in which we disappoint each other. They are like little grains of sand that find their way into sweaty summer shoes and rub against your skin until it is raw and torn.

Sometimes I don’t recognize the matter of fact, brusque person I see looking back at me in the mirror. Where has my empathy gone? I have become so accustomed to taking a breath and just doing what needs to be done. No time taken to allow for questioning myself or thinking about my fears. I have begun to expect the same of others, and feel derisive when they do not rise to the occasion.