Dear Lydia:

It occurs to me, some nights, that I may not be around forever. I’m not exactly the standard of healthy in a human being, but then, a terrifying end with a wrongfully placed bus might just be around the corner. The following is written in the case of my untimely demise (or as timely as it should be) or in the case that I am unable to give you the so-called ‘pearls of wisdom’ that only a father can provide.

First and foremost, I love you. I’ve loved you since the first time I heard your heart beating away in your mom’s tummy. My love for you grew exponentially the first time I heard you cry when you were born, the first time we locked eyes and you grasped my finger with your tiny little hand. It was then that everything in my life made sense – I had a reason, a purpose, and a love so magnificent that nothing could possibly break it. And the proof is in the details. Your mother and I lost plenty of sleep when you first came home, and though we hadn’t slept in weeks, we’d always plaster a smile and coo you back to slumber, because love makes you brain-stupid. (we’ll get back to that one in a minute)
And maybe it’s because I love you that I would hold you in my arms before bed every night, which gave me an extremely painful case of tendonitis in my right wrist, and despite what the doctor said I STILL DID IT, EVERY NIGHT. Or maybe I just value a peaceful sleeping baby over a night of bonified hell-shrieking (which you were plenty capable of).
But let it be known that I love you, and nothing you can say or do will ever change that. Ever. You will always be my pride, my joy, and the little bit of sunshine that fills my world.

Where can I start? How does a person filter an entire lifetime of learning and responsibilities into one letter? Knowing full well that you are your own person and must make your own mistakes? It’s tough – but I’ll do what I can, retracting and editing this as best I can, until my end day is apparent. These are going to appear in a very random, no apparent order. And so it shall be.

1. Your mother is always right
Always, Always, ALWAYS listen to your mom. There will be occasions where things are going to sound completely batshit insane, and you’re going to feel like she’s out to get you. But know this: your mother has nothing but the best intentions for you, and she is always going to be looking out for your best interests. Your mother is a sweet, caring, faithful and loving person….she will never do anything to wrong you, harm you, or otherwise. Keep this in mind when you are angry with her, because deep down – your mother is always right.

2. Love makes you brain-stupid
It’s been proven scientifically a billion times over. As human beings our weakness is love, or the feeling of love, or what we perceive to be "love". Dopamine and seratonin brain chemicals. Love is your brain on drugs.
Is that a bad thing? Hell no. We love to love! And why not? It’s a tremendous feeling, one that compells people to do some pretty extraordinary things. And you too, will fall victim to love. Probably in your teen years, because every teenager is in love a few hundred dozen times. Teenaged love is so fleeting, they should have a science named after it as it’s faster than the speed of light.
I can’t give you wisdom on love, as love is personal to each and every human being on this planet. We are all snowflakes of a different character, to love whomever we want, whenever we want. All I can say, dear Lydia, is that you will feel the pain of a broken heart more than once in your life, and you will recover, and you will find that one person that makes you want to fly like a bird. And when you meet that person? Spend the rest of your life with them and be happy. Or don’t, and be happy! Whatever you choose, you do what makes you happy. No one else can make this choice for you.
If there is one more tidbit I can offer, It’s that love is not just feeling good. Love is pain, hardship, and to-the-bone work. Love will lift you up, but it will also tear you down. Love is probably the most difficult thing in this life, but in the end, it’s worth every last second.

3. Drugs kill puppies and kittens
Ok, so not really, unless you’re feeding kittens and puppies drugs. Which I would sincerely hope that my dear daughter would never do unless A) in some kind of predicament that relied on your feeding drugs to kittens and puppies in order to save your own life or the life of a loved one or B) There’s really no other situation I can think of where this would be ok.
So I’m between a rock and a hard place on this one. How do I explain drug usage without sounding like a fucking PSA but at the same time expressing just how harmful drugs can be?