I have lost so many…

My grandfather and grandmother on my mom’s side, my grandfather on my dad’s side. My great aunt Gert and my great uncle Matt (they were always like a third set of grandparents to me) Uncle Art, Uncle Ed, Uncle Bob, Meema, the most recent was Aunt Betty (she died this month), too many pets to list, and I think worst of all was my cousin’s husband Howard.  He was only in his early 40s . I am 45. Every day I think that he was just a little younger than I am now when he left us. He was such a nice guy and a great friend. I think about everyone I have lost every single day. Not a single day goes by that I don’t grieve. It never gets any easier no matter how much time passes. I can meditate, think good thoughts, do all the positive stuff I want. Nothing makes it go away.