Dyscommunication

It’s not a word, I know.  Let me illustrate what I mean. 

First case: my parents again.  They offered to come over and work on my garden (well, it’s just a retaining wall with a creeper not-really-growing over it).  That was nice of them.  Anyway, I stayed home all day last Sunday and the Sunday before waiting for them.  They didn’t show up until 6pm last Sunday.  No apologies.  They brought some food and I guess that was supposed to make it all right.  

It sounds like such a little thing, but it triggers huge issues between myself and them.  The issue of them taking away my choices and pretending that a gift makes up for it. 

Anyway, I was so pissed off about it I ended up being rather snappy with them.  I’m not proud of it.  And the thing is, this family has this "don’t complain, don’t explain" culture.  They can’t ask why I was bitchy, I cant explain to them.  Likewise, I can’t complain about their making me wait.  So I can only hope they understand why I was annoyed.  And they can’t even tell me if they do.  Dyscommunication!

Second case: my friend Dave.  He ordered a book for me online as a gift.  This was some months ago, the company was pathetically slow in sending it.  Anyway, I receive an email from him saying he’s received the book, and that he hasn’t heard from me much lately.  But nevertheless, he says, he’s still going to sent me the book because he always keeps his word. 

What can I say?  Did I promise to email him daily in exchange for a book?  Am I morally inferior somehow, because I’ve failed to live up to his unspoken expectation?  In short, how rude!  And again, I don’t feel I can pull him up on it.  More dyscommunication!