Summer blue

[from an email to a friend. Content modified and augmented]

It was very cloudy in Galveston, and its been cloudy here since I got back Monday late. In fact, right now, as I type this, is the first time I’ve seen the glare of the sun on the cars in the parking lot (since I’ve been back). The result of all this, is that I am rather moodyblue. I am also very dehydrated (as I didnt drink hardly ANY water while I was gone) and that, too, I think, slows my thinking processes.

But, I have a little sun now! *grins*

I’ve also been very blue about Trynity. I went to Galveston this exact same time last year, for my neice’s graduation. During that week, Trynity & I emailed each other often, and once my cellphone was fixed (the battery died the day before I left, so I fixed it at phone center in Houston) we exchanged several calls, tantamount to being eager for my being home and our being able to spend time together. After all, this is the best time of year, season wise.. yardwork and stuff!

I received a very warm welcome at the airport, and lots of help in my first few days back (I also had a flat tire on the way to the airport, and she helped me get car out of salvage, and get new tire put on). Not to mention jumping right in on the outdoor stuff. She was in a woodworking rave then…. so we built a bench. (Okay, she built a bench. I held screws and helped varnish it…)

Anyway, here it is, the exact same time one year later… .. *very far off stare, squinting through time and hearts and eons….*

*recovering, sigh* I miss my buddy.

I miss “anybuddy”, but I miss her company especially. She’s like your baby-blanket. Any blanket would keep me company, and I’d appreciate any blanket right about now…. but, that special blanket… *soft smile, sigh* Its the heart of what friendship is all about. It doesn’t matter how tattered and worn the blanket is…..

Anyway, so, the past few days have been hard for me. I have compensated by burying myself in the computer after work when I have time, and some when I don’t. And I try to sleep…. *laughing* Oh, but thats another thing! I can’t sleep!! I don’t fall asleep until like 3, 3:30 am! I can nap really well when I get home from work, but thats a prime time of day and I can’t stand to sleep long at that time! *giggling argh of frustration*

*giggling anew* AND, when I do sleep, I dream in Tribes 2 themes!! All last night I ran around a college campus with what was essentially an electric broomstick. The point was to tag (joust, tap, poke, whatever) your opponent with your broomstick. That reset them. Or, I got poked and I got reset. *shaking head* It was a clever adaptation of what must be becoming a tired theme even to my sleeping brain!

*rereading what I wrote* This not having a buddy thing is hard. All of my life I’ve had constant companionship. Or at least, companionship whenever I wanted it. Jimmy lived up the street of my grade school home, and we explored “the road” together (it was a dirt road that went into a field by some trees. Very mysterious when the grass is taller than you are!)

In junior high, there was a younger kid in my neighborhood who I hanged-out with regularly during the summer, and there was a classmate about a mile down the road who was a frequent guest. We used to have dirt-clod wars in the basement pits of new homes being built.

Later on, when Yort and I had cars, we were frequently inseperable, but we still maintained our own separate cliques, too.

College, my first semester, I dormed with a friend from high-school – yeah, okay, we saw ENOUGH of each other! *grin* but then in Phoenix, as the Graphic Design Student Association secretary, I was surrounded by people all the time. We had a community studio setting, so there were always patriots in arms to pal around with…..

Then, back here after graduation, it was either Yort or Trynity…..

And now, no one.

I don’t know what it means. *mock-frumpy thoughtful expression* And, I am doing okay. I’m not complaining about anything else – life is still good! But, whats the point if there’s no one to share it with, eh?

*shrug, laughing* Okay, so I am complaining a little. Like I said, it does have me down abit right now…. I’m sure I’ll be okay soon. I just need to hang with some folks for awhile, and I’ll get a chance to do just that tonight at drama club….. I may even get to play some Tribes 2! (they have a computer where we are meeting for the summer).