One week

 I won’t even both apologizing for not being around. I do check this quite frequently and it seems that only a couple of my favs even bother to update anymore. Sarah, Jen, Valyn, and Dustin.

I’ve realized over the past few months that people I thought were really good friends, actually aren’t. They’re fine in the party scene, or in passing… but not in reliability. And I’m not the only one who thinks this way. Ever since I’ve started to express my extreme dislike for the majority of the crew, more people that I only knew as acquaintances have come forward and expressed the same displeasure. So I have a new ‘best friend’ who I will refer to as Diva. She feels very similar about the whole situation.

Soooo this bitch finally found a job! I work in a warehouse about 20 minutes from my house. I love it, it’s very physical which is exactly what I needed. About a month after I started there, I got Diva a job there. So we work together and we hang out like 3 or 4 days a week. I guess we are together so much that someone made a comment when I showed up by myself some where the other day haha.

In other news:

 

I’ve lost 50 pounds so far this year! FIFTY! Go me! I would honestly like to lose another 50-55, but 40 is much more of a reasonable number. I still don’t look very good, and I’m not being all too critical of myself. I definitely have gained more self confidence, and I definitely have been getting hit on my random guys. Which is always a nice feeling… but that brings me to something else.

Bumpy! We’re back on! As of the fourth of July. Long, upsetting story short: I chased that boy with all I had. And we did hang out a few times over the past couple of months… and we did hook up or mess around a few of those times. And he got mad at me within a few days any time something happened. I guess he has a huge fourth of July party each year and I was hesitant on going. (I had been texting him 2 days before the event and he had told me to "make sure I didn’t start any shit" just to give you an idea of how things were between us.) Diva said she would chill with me if I didn’t want to go. She knows the whole situation about everything and also shares dislike for the same members of our crew. But I met up with her after she drove her boyfriend home and we went to Bumpy’s together. I wore a skirt. I NEVER wear skirts.

The guys all made a big deal out of it and got their jabs in haha. I thought Bumpy was going to die. So the events of the day played out without a hitch. I ran one friend to a store to get ice and another one to pick up his cute older brother. Who I intended on hitting on or getting to know… but…

The night played on. Around 11/11:30 (my guess) I got the spins. I had been drinking my Gin and Diet Pepsi but also had some Hypnotiq and snorted a Vicodin. Spins was DEFINITELY from the Hypno. So I let Bumpy’s dog in the house and sat on the couch petting him for a little bit and started to feel really drowsy. So I went up to Bumpy’s room and laid in bed. I fully intended to leave when I was discovered, without putting up any kind of fight. I didn’t want to make him mad and push his generosity of offering people to crash if they needed to.

I am woken up to him opening his bedroom door and him saying, "I knew it." And I mumbled something. He started getting changed and I peeked at the clock. 3:30 am. He continues, "Everyone was asking where you were. They thought you left but we realized your car was still here. I said that I knew EXACTLY where you were." I laughed and sat up to start to wake up. I don’t remember exactly what happened but he started talking. Telling me that I looked good today. I said, "I heard that all day but I only wanted to hear it from you." He said he knew. Told me he wanted to take me on a date to dinner on Tuesday. I couldn’t believe my ears. I asked if he was drunk and he said no, and kissed me. I melted. He told me he got really jealous at one point because he thought I went home with Gurdek. I laughed and said, "I just walked him to his car… but he didn’t end up leaving." And then he told me that he had tried to make me jealous earlier. That he had been in the house with Ash and took a piss while she was changing in the bathroom. I said, "Your loss haha."

Ash lives in Connecticut. She is O-B-S-E-S-S-E-D with Bumpy. She has been for about 5 years now. She is a couple of years older then me (Bumpy is 21, I’m 24, and I think Ash is 26). She is a *cough* BIG girl. She is nice, but she gets on my nerves. And I know she totally resents me for any kind of relationship I’ve had with Bumpy. Whatever bitch, I’m not doing it to spite you. I don’t even know you.

We ended up just kissing and I kept asking if he was drunk. He kept getting offended. So I said, "Excuse me [Bumpy], for having my reserve for what you’re saying. We haven’t had the best track record." He asked, "When?" I said, "How bout the past 2 months when you hated my guts and wanted nothing to do with me." And he kissed me. And I slept over.

This week has been totally and utter bliss. He said he wanted to take things slow, but he also remembers everything that he told me that night. I went to his house on Tuesday night and we just chilled in his room and had a movie fest. Ended up having sex… which will probably stop. He’s very reserved about it and I think he honestly does want to be respectful and take things slow. I’m the freak, I’d do him every day 🙂

Today after work I came home and PASSED OUT. I slept from like 5:45 till 10:15 when I texted Bumpy and said, "jesus christ I’ve just slept all fucking afternoon." and then I passed out for a couple more hours and he texted me back and said, "aaaannnndddd?" I said, "Nothing, I was just saying." Then he asked what I was doing and stuff (he NEVER asks me to chill. It’s always me. Literally.) After a few texts I said, "I actually thought YOU were going to ask ME to chill for once." He says, "I thought you were going to." I said, "No I know [Brother Bump] is in town so I figured you’d chill with him." He replies with, "Do you want me to come watch a movie with you?" I asked if this was a set up. He said, "No, and you’re ruining it." So I said yes, drive slow (he works right near my house) and hurried to put myself together.

I met him outside and he walked up and gave me a kiss. We watched Iron Man, and cuddled up. I kissed him when he left… Oh I could kiss those lips all day. <3

I’m trying to keep a level head about it. And not get too excited. But I wanted this so badly, it’s hard not to be hopeful. And I told him that. I’m just worried because he’s young… 

I went out last night with some obscure member’s of the crew. Actually it’s Gurdek’s crew. And I didn’t know too many of them, but 2 of them were hitting on me. They asked if I had a bf and I proudly said, "No… but I am seeing someone." But then I got my white girl on and did some dancing with a few of them. I had a ton of fun and I’m glad I went. I also randomly say this guy Casey (

who, if you’ve been reading for the past 11 years, I might have mentioned wayyyy in the beginning.) It was funny seeing him. His step father is my boss. Weird coincidences haha. But I rescued his ass at the end of the night. Thought I was gonna be bailing him out of jail but thankfully didn’t haha.

I’m going to throw up a separate entry with some pictures. Three entries in one night!

Love you all in OD land… whoever is still around that is.