Obama’s Boxers

I had just washed my boxers and was relaxing in my chair reading a magazine article that said women were sending their panties to President Obama at the White House. As I  pondered this unusual fact, I looked over at my pile of freshly washed and dried, but somewhat wrinkled underwear, and wondered if, in the name of sexual equality, I should ship a pair of my boxers to our new and beloved President.

Hmm, which ones to send? The dark red ones I wore on that wild night with Celtic Woman after the concert? NO – I have to keep that pair for sure. How about the smiley face boxers my sister gave to me as a joke, and the Chief of Medicine saw me wearing? YES – I could get rid of a painful memory and send a goodwill gift to our new president at the same time.

Bursting with enthusiasm, I googled The White House, and was directed to their website. The website cautioned that for security reasons one should not send food or beverages, but, thankfully, there was no mention of men’s underwear. Soon my slightly wrinkled pair of Smiley Face Boxers was Fed Exing its way to the White House, to make our new President feel at home.

Well, I waited for a response to my most generous gift as the weeks went by. Nothing! Is it possible that the new administration could have overlooked such incredible generosity? What is it with this new generation of Democrats anyway? Yesterday I finally received an answer on beautiful government stationary.

 

 

Dear Robert E____,

The President and all of us at the White House appreciate the exceedingly generous gift of your slightly used Smiley Face Boxers, and the accompanying letter of support for President Obama. We all laughed heartily at the story of how the Chief of Medicine saw you in them.

Unfortunately, the previously mentioned pair of male under garments were damaged during the thorough security inspection that all unsolicited gifts must undergo, and are, unfortunately, no longer wearable. We have therefore given them to the newest member of the White House, Bo, the first family’s new dog, as padding for his doggie bed.

Sincerely,
 

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May 12, 2009

Wow, that’s just too funny.

May 12, 2009

wait…did they really send that letter back to you? Because if so that is totally awesome.

May 12, 2009

That was truly… Inspired!

May 12, 2009

That is a brilliant story, haha. Please tell me it’s true!

May 12, 2009

True story?

May 12, 2009

You have quite a gift there Rob. No one ever knows what’s fact and what is fiction.

May 12, 2009

Did you really get that letter?! If so, that is awesome!

May 12, 2009

omg you didn’t really send them did you? that is just too funny if you did you wild man. *kisses your cheek* have a good day. thanks for the smiles for me. MUAH. love the crazy woman in cali!

May 12, 2009

random- haha

May 12, 2009

Get out! You didn’t really send the President of the US a pair of your clean but worn boxers, did you? And….um…it’s none of my bees wax to be sure but inquiring minds just have to know; don’t you get that “jingle bell” feeling wearing those things?

This can’t be real.

May 12, 2009

what a testament to our view of the current administration that we’re able to entertain the notion that this actually might have happened. we went from having a president who made (most of) us feel utterly ignored, to having a president who makes (most of) us feel like we can mail him our undies and he’ll send back a thank you note. what a bizarre and enormous leap.

May 12, 2009

That’s brilliant.

May 12, 2009

Hahaha..is it true tho?

May 12, 2009

LOL I hope that’s real because that would be too funny 😛

May 12, 2009

lmao

Wow good one! for real?

May 12, 2009

oh wow!!! that’s brilliant AND hilarious!!!

May 12, 2009

Please tell me you’re joking. Either way, that is HILARIOUS. You rock.

May 12, 2009

Saw you on the front page – great story! 🙂

lol.

May 12, 2009

I can’t imagine that such a letter would be mailed back to you, but is that true? If so, that is hilarious.

May 12, 2009

I just let out an enormous belly-laugh and my roommates immediately asked me what was so funny. I read them this and we were in hysterics for several minutes before finally getting the laughter under control. Awesome.

May 12, 2009

Rob . . . You truly have “the gift” for telling a story, especially if we cannot tell whether if it is true or not. True or not . . . thank you for your healing stories!

I wish I thought for a second that was true. That would be so awesome.

Agh! How did I get logged out?? This is OTC, by the way.

May 12, 2009

did this really happen? cuz if it did this is the most amazing thing in the world and it made my year! even if this story is false, it still gave me a well needed chuckle!

Mns
May 12, 2009

haha. whether it be true or not, great story! 🙂

That’s brilliant. It’s great to see a sense of humour come out of such things and to have that acknowledged. Good on ya!

May 13, 2009

true or not, good for a laugh 🙂

May 13, 2009

“just washed my boxers and was relaxing in my chair…” good lord that gave me a mental pick of you relaxing nakkies in the chair waiting for said boxers to dry…

May 13, 2009

You need to frame that !!

May 15, 2009

You should’ve laid skid in them before you sent them. I’d have personally chosen a pair with a big donkey on them–and not cause he’s a Democrat, either. Heee-Haaaw! LMAO!

May 15, 2009

OMG! Thanks for the late night laugh!

May 16, 2009

roflmao

May 16, 2009

LOL!! I love this part: “Unfortunately, the previously mentioned pair of male under garments were damaged during the thorough security inspection that all unsolicited gifts must undergo, and are, unfortunately, no longer wearable.” LOL… I am wondering like everyone else, is this a true story? lol…

RYN: Thank you…you are right; I never needed cigarettes, or any other crutch (with attached slogan), to feel that I could personally raise myself a level. That had to come from within as time and events wizened me. I’m happier with the me I am now. Again, thank you for your nice note.~~Also…your boxers? Umm, maybe Mrs. Obama should have gotten them(If you did part with them!) He he! Take care.

RYN: Thankd you for your nice note. You are right. I never needed cigarettes, or any other crutch(with attatched slogan) to raise myself to any level. That has to come from within with time and experience. And as for the boxers…try Mrs. Obama instead. Let the hubby be chagrined at her getting such gifts of appreciation. ha ha! Take care sir.

May 27, 2009

I think this made my day. Haha. I heart you.

May 30, 2009

hmmm, i want to send him something now . . .

July 6, 2009

geeeeez….it seems i’ve been MIA for too long and am the last to know about your underwear escapades. for your information, i am president of the young professionals against poverty club, so you can FedEx me your underpants at any time. i promise i won’t give them to my first dog. and by the way – i’ve missed you!