Uninvited….(WoD)
"Like anyone worthy I am flattered by your fascination with me,
like any hot-blooded woman I have simply wanted an object to crave
but you, you’re not allowed, you’re uninvited, an unfortunate slight."
********
The mirror never lies.
Sasha looks at her full-length reflection, taking inventory. Why her? Why not one of a dozen other women in this city from whom he would have a much easier time getting what he wanted. One of a dozen of dozens. She tilts her head to one side, gazing at her image critically. What did she have that was so different?
Alright, girl. Start at the bottom and work your way up. Feet. Yep, two of those. Not too big, not too small. All ten toes. Ankles. Two legs, long enough to reach the ground and not so long that she looked like a stork. She makes a leg at her reflection, turning to show the muscle of calf and thigh. She smiles and blushes. Ok, so her legs were pretty nice, actually. And she had a pretty cute little bottom, too; at least, as far as bottoms go. Sasha grins. April was always going on about her butt. That was one area that Sasha felt needed little work. All that standing and walking all day kept her from getting a… generous.. behind, thank Gaia. She had nice hips, not too wide, but wide enough that she’d had small difficulty carrying her daughter. Child-bearing hips, her mother called them.
She snorts. This from the woman who’d nearly died every time she had one of her kids, being so tiny. She must have gotten those from her dad’s side of the family. Next item, her belly. Sasha frowns. This was an area she felt a bit self-conscious about. She had a good figure, but the slight roundness to her abdomen and faint stretchmarks from childbirth made her thankful she’d had a one-piece swimsuit made. Grimacing, she mentally adds a few sit-ups to her morning routine and moves on.
The next part of her anatomy up for perusal were what seem to draw the male eye nine times out of ten and what made her want to haul off and deck them almost as often. Child-bearing hadn’t done too much damage there, thank heavens. Set almost girlishly high, they were just the right size for her, what she would consider average. Of course, in the male mind, more seemed to be better. What was it with guys, she thinks absently, that made them think hauling these things around all day was so great? Caroline was a busty girl and the poor thing was always complaining about her back, and Sasha remembers how hard it was when she was breast-feeding. The extra weight seemed to pull right between her shoulderblades and made her feel incredibly top-heavy. Where they are is fine, she decides, as she turns in the mirror and eyes her profile briefly. Big enough, not too big. What was next?
He certainly can’t be interested what perches above all of this, she thinks as she makes a face into the mirror. An oval face, skin too pale from long hours spent in clinic, plain grey eyes, and a thick mop of black hair like a horse’s tail that reaches to her waist. Cheeks that blush at the drop of a hat, and a little snub nose that catches cold if someone so much as sneezes at it. She sighs. No, there was nothing remarkable about Sasha Albrecht. So what was it that had drawn the man in?
No, the question that needed answering wasn’t what had attracted him to her. The question that worried her was what was she going to do with him now that the Indomitable Mr. Sinclair had presented himself? She chews on one fingernail as she shrugs back into her bathrobe, pulls it tight about her, and goes to heat up some water for a late night cup of tea. He’d become so damn… accessable. And that was the last thing she needed.
A few minutes later the teapot whistles and she pours herself a steaming mug of tea. No, she hadn’t asked him in and she hadn’t made it easy, and yet the man was still there, still… waiting…. for lack of a better term. He wanted more, she could feel it, radiating off of him like a fever, but he didn’t push, didn’t whine, just placed himself in an… accessable… position and then left it to her. Damn him, she thinks, blushing as she sips her tea. How on earth could she tell him how badly she also wanted something more without crossing that boundary that she had drawn with her own big mouth.
He’d been so patient, so sweet. Part of her reminded her of Hawk’s words and, if a rake like Alexander Walker warned you about someone, you listened. But part of her yearned for him, yearned to throw herself blindly into the fire. Which part was right?
Her fingers drift to her lips, press softly where he’d kissed her, at the fireworks, there in the park for all the world to see. It had been so hard to keep herself distant, keep herself aloof, even as his lips met hers and the fire bloomed overhead. She’d felt like she was drowning and the sensation both terrified and exhilarated her. How in the world was she going to hold herself together now?
She lets her hand fall and sips her tea. Another question presented itself as she sat, silent, in the still kitchen. How was she going to get to sleep after all of this?
********
"Like an uncharted territory I must seem greatly intriguing,
You speak of my love like you have experienced one like mine before,
But this is not allowed, you’re uninvited, an unfortunate slight.
I don’t think you unworthy,
I need a moment to deliberate."
-Alanis Morrisette, ‘Uninvited’