Concert and an old aquaintance

Well do you remember when I told you about Dermot and the way he told me he still thinks about me and that? After he picked me up from the airport that time? Well you know Dermot and me used to be together for about a year and a half a few years ago. Anyway… I didn’t respond to what he said that night because it was an awkward situation seeing that I was with Romuald…

Well… since I broke up with Romuald I sent Dermot a message on Facebook saying that I thought it was very brave of him what he did and that I like him a lot and think about him as well but that I don’t think it’s a good idea for us to get back together because I doubt that the "problems" we had would have magically disappeared. I also mentioned the letter I wrote him a few years back after we broke up. In that letter I told him that I really love him but think I am not "in love" with him and care about him so much and miss him etc etc. It was a very long and very touchy-feely letter. Very confused as well… so anyway… back then he never responded to the letter. So in my message to him on FB I said something like: "Well I said all that in the letter already… remember… the letter you didn’t bother responding to?"

So anyway… in his response he said that he remembers the letter very well and that I said some really nice things about him in it. And (waiiit for it) that he carries the letter in his jacket pocket every day…

*jaw drop*

Yeah… I was baffled. I didn’t know WHAT to say to that… that is SO sweet! Who DOES something like that??? Nobody…

Anyway so we mailed back and forth and I told him that for now I don’t want to start a relationship. Not with him and not with anybody else etc etc

But we ended up going to a gig on Tuesday. Mark Geary. We had a really nice time and the gig was great. But nothing happened really.

So yeah… that’s the story… I really don’t know. I mean I really really care about him a lot and I think and talk about him a lot as well… he’s one of the nicest people one could ever meet. But…. I don’t think that’s enough to get back together… cos there were "problems" there that I don’t think should be overlooked you know? Like… we didn’t get on very well in bed for example… story of my life… I meet a really nice and sweet guy but the problem is that they are very nice and sweet in bed as well and that just totally turns me off… I need a man to be a MAN in bed…. hard and rough and strong and passionate…

Oh this sucks…. 🙁 Why are things never just good enough for me????? I really don’t know what to do. Well I asked him if he’s around this weekend. Would be nice to hang out a few times and see if/what (something) is there… know what I mean? Wait and see. He didn’t get back to me yet. He just started a new job.