Snippet….

this is a snippet of a story I might wright one day… or a poem I might write…. or something…. it may even be self contained…. it’s just an idea I came up with the other night and thought I’d write it down…. I dont feel this way myself so dont think that…. but I’m reading The Bell Jar By  Syliva Plath at the moment so if it’s a little depressing then thats why….but here it goes….

       It was dusk outside so the room had fallen suddenly into darkness. I didn’t feel the need to get up and turn on any of the lamps; the TV seemed to be enough for the moment. It was on mute. I had no interest in the news; I just stared blankly at the screen. Story after story filtered into my living room, most of the pictures meaning nothing to me. I had the stereo playing in the background. A CD had arrived in the post some weeks before, yet I had only just found it and put it on. Although I could hardly say I was paying attention to that either. Then the sports reader came on. I’ve never been into sports. Never really found them enjoyable and I was always the last girl to be picked for a team. I know it’s a cliché, and people are usually still bitter about it years on. But it’s not like that for me. I was always wishing that I didn’t have to play at all, so it suited me just fine to be left towards the end.
    Anyhow, in the odd state of mind I was in, I found some bizarre pleasure in watching the highlights from a golf game that appeared to be rather important. Watching image after image of little white balls rolling across grass that seems a little too green into the small hole. It made me think that this game, which I had never played, was a lot simpler then I had previously thought, even though I knew I was kidding myself. I followed each white ball eagerly until it disappeared from view. This seemed to go on for five minutes or more before the bright green suddenly vanished and the sports reader reappeared.
    As I couldn’t hear what he was saying and my music was still floating around somewhere behind me, so my mind went off on its own tangent. I felt like the man behind the desk was looking directly into my eyes. It had been such a long time since a man had spoken to me with this much attention that it took me by surprise. I started to imagine all the things that this handsome man could be saying to a girl like me. Surely they couldn’t be the things I’d love to hear, but then again, he is looking at me rather intently. The thought of it gave me a shiver and I found myself smiling. Alone in my living room, I was smiling.
    Just when I was getting a little too carried away the news came to an end. I was a little disheartened but soon found comfort in the credits. They scrolled up the page and I was soothed by the knowledge that they would start at the bottom and disappear at the top. When the whole program had finished I discovered that I was searching through all the other channels watching other show’s credits. Never really paying attention to any of the names or titles, just watching the travelling words.