Old Habits Die Hard

I haven’t done this in ages. I used to have a bloopdiary in the early to mid 2000’s but after I had my daughter I slowly & permanently neglected it until it was deleted. I think it’s time I start writing again.

There’s so much I want to say all at once! Lately I’ve been feeling down in the dumps. I’ve gained weight thanks to being on the birth control shot. I’ve discontinued it’s use, & started working out again, which is helping my self esteem. I’m still very hard on myself in life. I’m not where I thought I’d be at the ripe young age of 28 going on 29. I still have goals that are very well within my reach, it’s just taking me longer to reach them. AND IT SUCKS!

Did I mention my transmission is in the shop & I’ve been without a car for 11 days & I’m out about $1300 because of it. Rental car included. If only money grew on trees.

I’m still in need of "the guy" for me. I knew it would be hard to find him but I figured I would have met him by now. What’s the hold up? Not that I’m desperately on the search. Then again, I don’t really put myself out there either. It’s hard finding a balance though. When am I supposed to find the time to meet a guy? I’m usually working. When I’m not, I’m at home alone, or at home being a mom. I don’t have the perks of having two involved parents in my child’s life. Idk… it gets frustrating watching people around me grow and evolve in their lives while I’m stuck in this… black hole. I blame my parents for a lot of it. If I knew this is how things would have turned out, I might have thought twice before I left babydaddy… as insane as that would have been.

Off to bed….