Doing and undoing

If you’re wondering why I haven’t noted you or commented to you about that exciting news you’ve written about in the past week or two, it’s because I haven’t been reading you. I’m sorry. I’ll get back into the habit of reading eventually. A month from now, at the latest. I’ve been stupidly busy, and stressed, and life is generally sort of upsetting. Lots of it is work and stress and worrying about getting all the things I need to get done done. The show isn’t going as well as I’d’ve hoped, although I’m generally happy with how I’m doing, except for last night, when I couldn’t remember my lines, even though I’d studied them and was accuratly reciting them to myself just an hour earlier.

I went to a G&S sing-in in New York on Saturday with Emily. It was pretty awesome, and I felt talented. And I spent some time with Elsie, which was nice. On the way home with Emily, my car had some weirdness. I made it to Boston alright, but had some trouble leaving — the car wouldn’t start. I called AAA, but eventually it did start, and I got back on the road. Fifteen miles later, on the interstate highway, my car shut down. Repeat the process, and I basically made it home and did not die in a terrible car accident. I took my car to the shop on Monday, where they told me they couldn’t check it out until Tuesday, at which point they charged me $100 to tell me I needed to go to a transmission specialist.

So Wednesday morning I took it to the transmission specialist, and Wednesday afternoon, they tell me that they can’t figure out what exactly is wrong until they pull apart and rebuild the transmission. $760 to do that. Then, depending on what they find, repairs have an average cost of $1700-$2100. Good Lord do I not have that kind of money.

I told him I had to think about it before authorizing that repair, but the thinking revealed to me that I don’t really have any choice. I need a car, and I can’t afford a new one, and even though my car isn’t worth that much more than $2000, I can’t get another car for that much that would be as good as my car would be if it worked properly. I got on the internet this afternoon and got instant approval for a new credit card with zero interest for the first year, and am now emotionally preparing myself to go into significant debt for the first time in my life. It was that or cancel my trip to Buxton. I hope this was the right choice. I WILL pay this all off by the end of my 12 months — hopefully, I’ll have paid most of it off by the end of the summer. I make good money in the summers.

Lots to do… have to go. Voice lesson, then rehearsal today. Visiting Emily tonight, and returning to Providence in the morning, for the first time since Wednesday afternoon. I’ve papers to grade.

Oh yeah, and there’s a new girl. I’d be ecstatic if I weren’t so upset. I mean, I sort of am. It’s a weird situation. In me, there meet an antithetical combination of elements…