A soulful-eyed young man

I had pretty much the worst day, today. I got up, with my nose surprisingly stuffy. I had a sort of awkward AIM conversation with Heidi, in which she told me in a very friendly and jovial sort of way that I carry myself as “smugly intelligent”. When I asked for clarification, she observed that “my ego doesn’t need any stroking”. Do I really still come across that way sometimes? Obviously so, but damn.

Ben and I are pretty much out of food, and both too busy to go shopping. He’s going tomorrow (it’s his turn, anyway), but I didn’t really have breakfast, which was fine, because it was pretty much lunchtime by breakfast time anyway. That was difficult, too, though. We need more food.

My backpack felt extra-heavy, and my walk felt extra-long, as I walked the 1.6 miles to my voice lesson. I worked on memorizing “Du bist wie eine Blume”, and was frustrated at the surprising difficulty of it. I arrived, started trying to sing warmups, and failed. My voice just plain didn’t work. I wasn’t accessing my upper range, my throat wasn’t opening… it was really dreadful. Kevin sent me home early with instructions to rest. Fantastic last lesson of the semester. Did I mention that I’m singing a concert tomorrow night?

I also realized while I was walking out there that I needed my car in the evening, since I’d promised to drive Lydia home from rehearsal, but had left it at home and had my entire afternoon booked. Cutting my lesson short, though, gave me time to go back for it. Another, nicer, IM conversation with Heidi, and then off to seminar. JVC held us late, but part of that was because he was getting emotional about his last seminar ever here; he’s moving to USC after this year, so I couldn’t bring myself to be mad at him.

Then I went to rehearsal for the concert, realized I wasn’t in my costume wear for the dress rehearsal, drove home, changed, and returned. I became more and more frustrated as the evening went on. I was marking my music, although my voice was feeling somewhat better. Rehearsal just kept going and going, but eventually it was done and I came home.

Looking over this entry, it doesn’t feel as frustrated as the day itself felt. It really was a pretty awful day. But then, at night, I got a phone call from Lauren.

Lauren is directing Patience at Rice next semester. They’ve been auditioning, and it turns out they’re short a Bunthorne. And Lauren gave me a call, and asked me to perform the role of Bunthorne in the Rice Light Opera Society production of Patience. “But wait!”, you say, “the Rice Light Opera Society performs at Rice University, which is Houston, Texas! You, Jonathan, live in Providence, Rhode Island! How can you be in their show?”

I’m to *fly out* to Houston for two weekends in March, to perform. Possibly, I am absolutely crazy for agreeing to do this, but it’s just too exciting and fun and really cool an opportunity to turn down. I’m planning on spending January in Houston anyway, so I’ll get to do some early rehearsing then. And then I’ll fly down for two dress rehearsals and three performances the week of March 15, returning Sunday for two seminars and two meetings for the course I’m TAing, and leaving again late Wednesday or early Thursday for three more shows.

This will represent a few firsts for me. Most obviously, it’s my first time doing a leading role in a show in a situation like this — I was asked to step in; I didn’t go out for the role. But it’s also my first time performing a principal role that I’ve already performed.

Ok, I need to get myself to bed. But did I mention that I’m excited?

“OH, HOLLOW! HOLLOW! HOLLOW!”

What time the poet hath hymned
The writhing maid, lithe-limbed,
Quivering on amaranthine asphodel,
How can he paint her woes,
Knowing, as well he knows,
That all can be set right with calomel?

When from the poet’s plinth
The amorous colocynth
Yearns for the aloe, faint with rapturous thrills,
How can he hymn their throes
Knowing, as well he knows,
That they are only uncompounded pills?

Is it, and can it be,
Nature hath this decree,
Nothing poetic in the world shall dwell?
Or that in all her works
Something poetic lurks,
Even in colocynth and calomel?

I cannot tell.

Want to hear me recite it dramatically? Ok.

Polter-Cow

That’s…wow.

ryn: There’s an element of uncertainty to any observation in quantum theory. If you’re of the Einstein camp, you believe that this uncertainty implies a shortcoming of the observer. Those of the Copenhagen interpretation believe that the uncertainty is inherent to nature. Most physicists say they accept the Copenhagen view, but secretly believe in Einstein’s view.

But on the most part, how the quantum mechanics is “interpreted” is not considered an important part of physics. The theory works, regardless of what it means.

ninnoc

December 9, 2004

woo! how do you sound off stage, i wonder. very nice. love abby/

pixie37373

i am sorry for the frustrating day….but see, see how the bad is balanced by the good?….yay you!

ryn: That’s my bread n butter. I’ll write an entry on it if I get some time later.

Sabriel Modan

December 10, 2004

Oh yes, you are quite mad, but in a good way… 🙂

ryn: I would take that paper with a grain of salt. I don’t think he has a clue what he’s talking about. He insists that the controversial aspect of this paper is that he’s going against the widely-accepted premise that causality is the cornerstone of all science. But no physicist would agree to that.

Modern theories in physics, particularly those in concordance with the Standard Model of particle interactions and relativity, regularly account for events which may see to “violate” causality. So I think he’s picking apart an argument few would make.

Now, as I stated, scientists try to “sell” the Copenhagen story, but secretly either don’t care one way or another or have faith in Einstein’s assertion that a hidden variable theory will come along, even though it was disproved with Bell’s theorem.

I think it’s because of the god-like status Einstein has in this field. All of his proposed theories have turned out to be correct, some several years after his death. He’s a good handicapper to bet with. So while few physicists publicly support the hidden variable theory, I think that’s what they would bet on.

You’re right about the random element being disheartening. But I think the real problem is in our definition of free will. If our actions are pre-determined, then so is our control and our free will. I’m perfectly okay with that.

ryn: Here is why I dismiss it. One of the most common misconceptions about Newtonian dynamics is that it includes the concept of causality. Newton’s 2nd law in particular is commonly mistook for such. F=ma is believed by novices to mean that a force causes an acceleration that is proportional to the mass. This is not true.

Newton’s 2nd Law is a definition. It means that this abstract concept we will call a “force” is used to describe a change in acceleration due to an interaction between bodies. There’s no causality in it. It is an equivalence. It’s not even a law in the strict sense of the term. The concept of “force” is invented for the purpose of making sense of changes in acceleration.

It is not something separate from the acceleration which causes the acceleration. If the author doesn’t understand that, I’m not going to spend time reading his further explorations into the topic.