Dear…
Dear Gym Guy,
No I do not like you. No- I do not want to go out with you. And frankly, the fact that you continue to ask me out despite the fact that I usually lie and say I’m dating someone, have said I was busy, have avoided you when at all possible, make it clear that I’m there to WORK OUT, etc. is really freaking annoying. No- I’m not even flattered because 1) you constantly interrupt my workout even if I keep my headphones on and keep going, and 2) you’re “that guy” that doesn’t even work out but just pretends to play basketball for a few minutes before walking around the gym for “social hour”. Please stop asking me out- because pretty soon I’m going to stop being so nice and just say “I’m NOT interested.”
Dear “work partner”,
You are a SLACKER and I’m so effing sick of it! You are not only supposed to be the “bread winner” and a model FATHER for your family, but you are also affecting MY work, MY efforts, and MY commission. Grow up. You should not have to be babysat and have me and Dave constantly following up with “did you do this”, “did you ever call her back”, etc. I am TIRED of walking by your desk and seeing you waste all of your time on YouTube. And even more tired of picking up for your slack. There are so many people out there in the world that would be so appreciative to have the job that you have, and be MUCH more qualified for it as well. 13 excuses/missed days/lies since you have started on January 1st?!?!? Hmm..I find it interesting that in 3 months all of this can go wrong:
· Daughter sick, car driver seat detached, had to take Dad to the doctor, forgot laptop at home, stomach bug, threw back out, had an “appointment”, had to run an errand for my wife, power went out at home- slept through alarm, forgot about the time change, food poisoning, car problems again, and the latest…”gastro-intestinal issues”…
That is insane. And you are either the MOST unfortunate/unlucky person I know….or…a worthless liar.
That is all for now. Can you tell that this has been a GREAT start to my day? Well, at least I’m not having “gastro-intenstinal” issues like my partner! GAH!!!!!!!!!!
Your partner sounds like a total tool. I used to work with a guy that used his kid as an excuse for EVERYTHING. I was *always* doing his job and it pissed me off to no end and I used to think that plenty of people managed to have offspring and get to work within 15mins of the time they were supposed to…unlike his 1.5hr margin of error. Grrrr. Like it wasn’t bad enough that he didn’t DO anything.
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Lizzen up fuffy, guys are not subtle creatures. You say, “I’m dating somebody,” and he hears, “She needs to know I’m waiting in the wing in case.” What you need to say is, “No, I’m not interested and I will not become interested and you must stop interrupting my workouts. Forever.” If that doesn’t work, you tell him the next time, “Leave me the fuck alone or I’ll make a scene.”
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They’re not like us. I mean, if somebody turned down my friendly overtures ONCE (not to mention 1,800 times like you have here), I’d be all, “Hey, yeah, have a nice life.” Don’t need to reject my sorry azz twice. But evolutionary dictates have not allowed men to operate that way.
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oh, ryn: NANG = Not A Nice Guy. He’s a hypercritical, micromanaging, condescending buttwad that I work with.
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Geez! He has some issues, obviously! As for gym guy, you may have to go with “sorry bud, not interested. And I’m here to work out, not get asked out”. Seriously–he needs the cold, hard truth!
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