nothin doin

38-40plus hours a week, and I keep reminding myself that once I graduate school I won’t have to work so hard, and I’ll get paid better.

My advisor at school and I have been emailing each other back and forth for the last week or so, and she’s going to call me tomorrow so we can discuss what I’ve been doing, and how I’ve changed, I guess? and basically I guess I’ll find out if I’m going back or not. I’m guessing it’s probably too late to transfer to another “real” school for the spring, but I could always take classes at the community college in the spring, if necessary and transfer somewhere else for next fall. I did, however, think I’ve figured out what I want to major in. Except I dont think they really have that major at Hopkins, lol. Well if I stay at JHU, it’ll be economics. If I go elsewhere (which is looking more and more likely, even if i do go back for the spring, I’ll prob transfer for the fall) it’ll be business.

I’m realizing, slowly but surely, that all that really matters is that I’m happy. It doesn’t matter if I go to a prestigious school, or if I major in something that most people have no clue what it is, let alone are even able to pronounce it. Being the type of person I am–a people pleaser that also enjoys being the center of attention– this was a hard lesson to learn. I remember thinking of some of my friends, “wow so-and-so is sooo smart… why are they going to that school or majoring in that??” And of course, I didn’t want anyone to be thinking the same of me. But they like their schools (with the possible exception of JM) and they like their majors–they’re happy. I need to find what makes me happy.