all these years

 “Steal my heart and hold my tongue.

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I feel my time, my time has come.

Let me in, unlock the door.

I’ve never felt this way before….”

 

I need to get to work and write.  I’m in my office, the website’s almost up and running, got isbns and I am registered and ready to go.  I need to get to work on “Degeneracy” and I need to be in a 17 year old nerd’s mindset.  Yeah, I’m too fucking mad to concentrate.

 

I’m in my Office with “The Office” (BBC) playing in the background.  I need to get to work and what the fuck was he thinking?  How fucking stupid does he think I am?  This is the fucktard that texts me, on average, 14 times a day.  The last gig he played he texted me 8 times from the gig.  Last night…. Not a fucking word, not an emoticon, not a damn thing.  So I ask first thing in the morning,

“What were you doing if I send you a text at 20 after 9 because I hadn’t heard from you, you don’t text me back until 10:59 p.m. saying your just setting up now and you left at 5:45 p.m…. what exactly were you doing for over 3 plus hours?  “

 

“Just waiting to play.”

 

“Okay, who the fuck did you talk to in that 3 plus hours while you were waiting to play?”

 

“Mostly Weaver.?”

 

What the fuck was he saying?  How fucking stupid does he think I am?  At this point I know he’s avoiding saying something because I’m not fucking stupid, some might even go so far as to say “wise to this shit”. 

 

“Mostly, Jordan? Mostly?  How ‘bout you fuck off Mr. Sketchy and leave me the fuck alone.”

 

 

Mature, I know.  You’re jealous, right?  You wish you had that much decorum.  I know.  Are you fucking kidding me though?  He knows about all the trust issues that exist between us.  We rarely trust anybody, I trust no one and he trusts no woman. 

 

“Hold my head inside your hands,

I need someone who understands.

I need someone, someone who hears,

For you, I’ve waited all these years….”

 

 

turns out after six minutes of conversation that there were females there that he should have texted me about, which he always has, but didn’t this time.  too much unaccounted for time as far as I’m concerned.   Plus I fucking hate McLeod because he’s a hobby musician that doesn’t give a fuck about the other band members who want to make it as professional musicians.

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