what’s up with all the breeders?

So it feels like most of my facebook friends either have kids or are pregnant. I have 6 who are pregnant right now. Everytime I see their status update of “Its a boy!” or “In 5 months Margot will be here” I feel rage. I’m not really sure. Its something I’ve been considering for a few weeks to figure out what the exact reason is. My thoughts thus far:

1. I hate how people obsess about their baby once they become pregnant. I don’t like seeing all the updates about how the baby has hiccups, the morning sickness is hard or asking for votes on names. WTH? You’re asking facebook for names? Oh, and the worst are the pictures of the bellies being updated every week. I really don’t care how your wife is stomach is “bumpin’ ” every week. Its weird. I can’t avoid the image in my feed and its like a train wreck I can’t ignore. And every week, there’s a new one. They keep coming until I’m at the point of “Just have it already, you look terrible.”

2. Being pregnant = future updates and facebook profile pictures will be dedicated to said future progeny. There’s nothing wrong with being proud of your kids – and facebook is a great way to show off your kids and share with friends. BUT – when every status is about your kid I really start to itch. I don’t care about your kids eating or nap schedule. No one really cares about that.

3. What really bugs me are people who get married and then get pregnant right away. WHY? Is the point of marriage really having children right away? And why are people willing to just keep having kids without letting the first one(s) grow up a little? I have several friends who do not believe in birth control. So what happens – one right after the other and now you have more kids than years married, even though you didn’t get pregnant until after marriage. I just don’t get it.

4. Why have kids at all? What is this attraction for “breeding”? Kids are cute – I’ll be the first to admit that. But they are always there, they never go away, and they cost so much. I’ve heard “Oh, you’ll think differently when you have one” – yeah, because when I have one I won’t be rational and I won’t have a choice. If I’m not into the idea pre-baby, then any change post-baby is a hormonal side-affect. I don’t understand why people can’t believe I am not driven that way.

5. Mormons & Catholics = superior rage. My boss is Mormon and is about to have his 4th kid. So far he has all the appearance of being a financially responsible person, so he can probably afford all 4 kids. (Although on one income you really hope he can keep up with the increasing expense.) But what REALLY gets me is how kids are seen as the pathway to a better heaven. Let’s make tons of babies in favor of getting closer to god! Sounds like a great plan (and a god I certainly want to follow…).

But the reason I think that nabs at me the most:

6. I probably won’t ever be able to have kids, so I’m protecting myself psychologically. I have a condition (PCOS) that means my hormones and cycle don’t work without fake hormones, ie, birth control. So, no birth control, very low estrogen, no cycle, no ability to get pregnant. My best chance of ever getting pregnant is being on birth control because that’s the only time I ovulate. Birth control = no pregnancy but on very rare occasions. So no, its better that I tell myself I won’t ever be pregnant because, really, I probably never will. I’ll be the fun Aunt. I will be OK with that.

Ultimately, I don’t really want kids. But I’d like to have a choice, rather than it being made for me.