i’m lovin’ it

i think for the first time in a long time things have kinda just settled with p and i. maybe its because my feelings towardshim arent nearly as strong as they once were. maybe its because i dont feel so jealous everytime i hear another girls name, and maybe just maybe its because i know i cant feel jealous or hurt by him anymore. i have noticed lately that he brings up mary’s name more often. he used to shy away from this telling me as little as possibleonthe subject of miss mary. lately i know when shesaround and so forth. like tonight we talked about her and he told me she is coming over tomorrow. i like this new found information. i like the openess andi like the fact that i dont even care even more. i used to agonize over her visits nightl, wondering what they were or were not doing and wondering why she had to be there. now i dont care, he sees her like 1/10th of the amount he sees me and i know shes going home, unlike me who never goes home. i understand its good to hang with other friends even though they may be exes. i understand all this because lately i myself have gotten my own life. i used to revolve my life around his but now i revolve my life around me. i love it. if i wanna go see chris i do, if i feel like a chick chat i go see sarah or danielle and if i wanna just pal around with someone i may call sean and i love it. i dont feel guilty or like a cheater doing this. i still se p more then anyone else, and i love that as well. we work well together, this whole friendship thing is great with us and i dont regret the time we spend together its just totally nice to see otherpeople at times and not be so loyal to one person. he wanted to come over tongiht and play tennis but the place was booked and he ended up goign with dianne (the roomate) instead. i was kinda dissappointedeven thoguh i was not really in the mood to play tennis anyways. i will see him friday and iam good withthat. we plan on making dinner, relaxing in the most comfiest clothesand watchin a dvd. its perfect. tongiht i may go see chrisand on thursday maybe a dinner date with sarah for chick chat. my week sounds perfect and i am lovin it. i feel like writing lately actualyl so i apoligize for all my entries. read the one before this though, it was decently interesting if i say so myself. still havent gone favs only but eventually ithink if i got tons to say thats priate.bebye for now