A Sad Story

Tomi and Jerry 07

 

I would like to say that this is simply a love story.  I would like to say that it has a happy ending.  With all the emotion in my heart I at least have to say a couple of words about the beautiful and tragic story of Tomi and Jerry.

 

For as long as there has been Jerry, there has been Tomi or so it seems.  They were married for 10 years and together for 14.  High School Sweet hearts.  That in and of itself is a bit of a success story for a young man of 31.  He only dated one other girl and very briefly, for once he met Tomi his heart and their lives were cemented.

 

They began their lives together in a tiny stone chapel in Tamassee Salem. A beautiful idyllic chapel; the kind of fairy tales. Beautiful taffeta dresses and words spoken of undying love.  Promises Kept.  Promises to Keep.

 

Many content years were spent until they tried to start a family.  The very act that brought them even closer as they endured losing one child, a set of twins and then a third pregnancy and 4th child.  Sprits unbroken as they finally triumphantly conceived carried and delivered Tristen the cutest white headed boy alive since Jerry Dean himself.  We used to call Jerry Cotton top; I suppose Tristen carries that tradition still with his pure and white head.

 

After Tristen came a second miracle named Grace Lynn.   The third love of Tomi’s life.  A perfect family.  Dedicated to God with every fiber.  Jerry contemplating the ministry.  Tomi a stay at home mom ‘retired” from nursing to complete and protect them.

 

It was once said that She wanted to be a stay at home mom to 5.  A dream unrealized.

 

Today Tristen is about to turn 2.  Grace just became 4 months.  And Tomi died suddenly in her sleep last week.  A life unrealized.  A dream incomplete….and two precious baby angels left with one dedicated father lost in his world.

 

As I went through the funeral home line and embraced Jerry; a full and exploding room full of unbelieving friends and family trying to grasp an incomprehensible idea and life cut short standing behind me to offer their support.  Jerry sobbed in my arms and simply said, “It’s too soon, it’s just too soon”

 

In that very same stone Chapel where their lives began, their lives parted.  Her sister spoke of Tomi’s  amazing influence and inspiration on her life.  Jerry spoke as well through a broken and raspy delivery and the only words I remember, “She was my world” and “But as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord”

 

God Bless Jerry.

God Bless Tristen.

God Bless Grace.

 

In 14 years together the very first day that Jerry had not talked to Tomi and told her that he loved her was Wednesday, the day that she died.

 

 

 

A few additional facts to complete the story.

 

Jerry is my first cousin. 

Jerry was away for training and had to be driven home on a 2 ½ hour drive before reaching his home.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt”>Tomi was alone with the two babies the night she died in her sleep.   Two children she had been keeping tried to get in the house but when unsuccessful went to get Tomi’s mother.  They had to break the dead bolt to gain entry.  Tomi’s mother found her in her bed with her hands clasp as in a peaceful sleep. 

The autopsy showed a slightly enlarged heart with flappy skin.  They kept some samples to test to try and determine the cause.  Unsure if it was perhaps an infection related to child birth, they are still researching.

Baby Grace was still nursing.