Screw me over and hammer my head…

I’m so sick and tired of what this place is doing to me…it’s not fair…we’re supposed to have vacation for a holiday and they don’t want to let us take it…I was planning on using that day to go out with my friends for my birthday(which just happens to be this thursday) and now I probably won’t be able to…they say that the workers are complaining that we act as if we’re doing them a favor that we’re here…we don’t-we never have…though in actuality-we ARE…they treat us like we’re nothing…like we’re something they stepped in…i’m not asking to be worshiped…I just want to be valued, to be respected…is that too much to ask for? probably…without us this place wouldn’t function…we hold it together…if not for us they’d actually have to pay someone to do the job or worse, they might not find anyone to do it and then they’d be royally screwed…but they don’t seem to realize that…they keep complaining about stuff that doesn’t mean anything…they can’t pay us any less and they can’t fire us…so do they think that yelling at us will help? yelling at us for stuff thats not even our fault in the first place…? We happen to be doing them a service (hence the name, National Service) so why can’t they appreciate it in the least?!?! Its not worth complaining about it since nothing will change but I needed to get some of it off my chest…

On to something else…my new job at the bagel place is going really well…I’ve been working there for a week already and since the second day have been closing up shop…alone…I don’t have a problem with it and I seem to be doing things wonderfully but personally, I wouldn’t let someone who has only been working there for a day and a half be responsible for locking up the shop…but hey, thats just me…anyways, I need to tell them that I can’t work on tuesdays…i’m going to tell them that its because of National service but really, its for a number of reasons….1) I need to be able to have a day that I can stay late at YadVashem in case I need to make up hours since they’re screwing around with us with that now as well…2)If I don’t have one day that i’m not working straight from 7am till 10pm I will most definitely die of exhaustion…3)I want to have a night off-to myself…and last but not least, 4)I want to be able to play basketball at least once a week…but really, the main reason is…I just can’t take it…even the rest is too much for me but I can’t give it up…with my parent’s financial situation I can’t take the liberty of giving up a job where i’m earning a nice ammount just because i’m lazy…they don’t have money for alot of things and I can’t blame them for that right now…so I need to make the effort to help out…I just cant help the fact that its slightly killing me…and to tell you the truth, its not the bagel place thats killing me even though its the night job…its the day job thats killing me…but I should really stop complaining…and if you’ve noticed that I haven’t really been writing lately its because I have abslolutely NO free time whatsoever…I work from the minute I get up till right before I go to bed…and no, I don’t sleep late or go to be early if thats what you were thinking…I just have very long days…so if I can keep up with it-it’ll be great and if not-well, sucks to be me…but I can’t quit…I don’t have that option…at least not now…maybe things’ll get better…but for now I just have to suck it up and get to work…speaking of which-I should really be doing that now…so have a great day everyone…ignore the ubiquitous exhaustion and if your boss or coworkers are excerberose gits as mine are, try to ignore it…don’t harp on it…cuz it will only make things alot worse…

Stay gold people…anything less isn’t worth it…and anything more is unattainable…at least for me…at least for now…signing out is me, your messed down, inconsistant and discombobulated diarist, Brainiac…