At the risk of sounding like the biggest brat EVER

I’m crying as I’m writing this.  And I don’t know why.  My life really doesn’t suck all that bad, and maybe this is just all emotional crap.  I guess I have to face it.  I really AM a princess.  And I don’t mean that to sound cute or lyrical or romantic in any way.  I mean it exactly the way it sounds.  Just like a selfish, spoiled, brat who needs to be slapped across the face a couple times.  I demand attention.  I mean, normally, I’m cool if I don’t get it, but tonight I really need it and I can’t get it from anywhere and I feel like running outside and screaming that the world is against me.

Today I found out that the entire time I’ve been working on my Masters, I’ve not taken any of the extra courses I need to get my endorsement in elementary education.  This is not because I felt like being a slacker.  This is because, even though I asked, not a single person in an administrative position in the College of Ed told me that I needed these classes to get my endorsement.  And I’m all about, you know, getting help when you help yourself, but how much more of initiative do I need to take than, "I am now certified only in Music.  I want to be certified in general education K-6.  What do I need to do so I can teach elementary school after I graduate?"  WHAT ELSE IS THERE?  How much more do I need to do to make it known that I need HELP in figuring out how to be an elementary teacher?  What’s so frustrating is that I’m MORE than qualified to teach in an elementary classroom…I don’t need Earth and Space Science to teach what’s in the curriculum in front of me.  I do it all the time when I sub for teachers.  They leave me actual lesson plans because they know I’m a certified teacher.  And I teach the lessons the right way.  I do what they want me to do.  I know this because they ask me to teach again for them.

Anyway, so my day was just the icing on the cake…the cake being that I have about five loads of dirty laundry, no clothes to actually wear, and a dryer that won’t work.  And there really isn’t anyone that I can talk to.  Well, before just a few minutes ago, there wasn’t.  Everyone I talked to had to go after five minutes from "Hello".  My house is a freaking disaster and I can’t get it organized until I’m finished with my conferences this weekend.  And I can’t finish the conferences without my clothes.  My toilet is leaking and my landlord knows about it and won’t get his butt over here to fix it.  I think what made this day suck so much is that it’s just a bunch of little crappy things that have added up to one big pile of crap that I really don’t feel like walking through, climbing over, or being anywhere around.

There is a however, however…and this is it:
I will get to present my thesis at my church and it will be pretty much sponsored by the church, for advertising reasons (this works well when you live in the buckle of the Bible Belt).  And I do get to graduate with my Masters Degree in Classroom Teaching.  I just won’t be endorsed in elementary ed.  So, I sure as heck will be moving to Los Angeles next summer, just as planned.  I swear, nothing, short of the hand of God Himself, is stopping me.